Think Before You Speak

I have one thing in common with Toy Poodle, Yodie...we both need to avoid liquids after 6PM. When the pup avoids liquid intake he sleeps the night through and if I avoid liquids, I likely only walk my enlarged prostate to the 'John' three times a night instead of six.
My doctor told me that old farts, like me, often exasperate the late night urinating frequency because of anxiety. "  "You should think relaxing thoughts while standing before the commode," said the Doc.
The other night while waiting for things to begin, I found my sleepy-eyed thoughts take word-form while standing before the throne...I spoke saying, "Come little fella do your thing." I have no idea why I said those words aloud. Of course my wife, lying in bed, heard me talking. She yelled, " Who are you talking to?" I said, "An old friend you once knew." She did NOT think the comment was funny.

Surely, HE Made Us Different

I notice some great differences between my wife and I when it comes to clothing-shopping techniques. First, my wife is most 'at-home' in a retail store; I am not. Sales clerks cater to my wife with a lot of gobbledygook chit-chat. Those same clerks know better when approaching me. They usually say, "Those pants are on sale today only."
Sales clerks know that women are perpetual shoppers whereas if a man is in the store HE NEEDS some thing NOW!
My wife will try on item after item and hold other clothing in front of her while looking into a mirror. Me? If it has an elastic waist band and does not 'ride-up-the-crack -of-my-butt,' I'm good to go! There is one other shopping difference:  My wife can produce a receipt from 1976; I often leave the receipt on the store checkout counter.

Never Give In ; Never Give Up !

A couple of days ago, I watched the movie, 'It's  A Wonderful Life,' starring Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed. I suppose I have seen this 1947 film classic more than fifty times. The movie seems to grow in appeal with each passing Christmas / Holiday Season. Why not, given the contemporary societal backdrop of darknesss, sadness and despair? Today we brouse our morning newspaper to read of school shootings, killings in American streets, terrorist attacks and beheadings of innocent people along with reports of a disconnected government. The very people we elect to guide us through perilous times dismiss the idea of compromise and cooperation as they grab for power and personal wealth.
The movie, 'It's a Wonderful Life,' reminds us that life is worth living, we should appreciate our blessings and the importance to marry the right person. Finally, as Clarence, The Angel, said to George Bailey, " No man's a failure who has friends."
May you count many blessings and friends the Christmas Season.

Fixin' To Agree

Yesterday while channel surfing for weekend news, I discovered that CNN, Fox News and MSNBC all held differing views and opinions on immigration reform, foreign policy and the definition of torture. There was one broadcast commonality on all three channels: Each cable news network was 'running' the exact same Viagra commercial; thus it appears that when old timers begin experiencing erectile dysfunction party politics will compromise. And you can bet your sweet ass that the one party, which does not wish to have insurance companies cover birth control costs will fight for insurance company paid 'weenie-lifter-pills.'

Works For Me

Abe said, "You can fool all the people some of the time and some of the people all of the time but you can't fool all the people all the time." Keep in mind that those 'all's & 'some's' can be applied to people 'liking' and 'appreciating' you. Some do some don't and some have their minds set in absolutes!
I learned this very valuable lesson at age eleven and I have never asked a quarter since. This attitude and approach served me well the past sixty-four years in all I have faced. I have a compass for service and wish to please those I love and those in need and I want nothing other than a clear pathway! I need no approval nor any hoorah. Actually, I was fortunate because early in life I understood that to live gloriously was predicated on one major factor: identify your passion to serve some thing other than self.

As Good As It Gets?

Melvin Udall, played by Jack Nicholson in the movie "As Good As It Gets," suffers from obsessive compulsive behavior. One movie scene shows Melvin coming out of his psychiatrist's inner office into a crowded waiting room; Melvin surveys the waiting patients and speaks, "What if THIS is as good as it gets?"
I would pose similar questions regarding current events: Does anyone really believe that ANY of the following will, in deed, 'get better:' 1. Conditions in the Middle East, 2. Prejudicial attitudes in America and religious intolerance around the world, 3. Credit card scams, 4. divisive politics reflected in American government, 5. America's Obesity, 6. Healthcare accessibility, 7. Necessary financial support for America's public schools and 8. General narcissism and greed?
This said, I do believe that the St. Louis Cardinals baseball organization could 'get better' by signing one more frontline pitcher. Hey, let's do what we can!

Lesson? Don't Get Hurt / Don't Get Sick!

Ten weeks ago while out for a morning three-mile 'power-walk,' I stepped from a curb and heard and felt a loud pop in my left knee. The event sent me to the ground. I gained my composure and hobbled four blocks home. I finally went to my health care provider (physician assistant) for an evaluation. She said I could try rehab. I did. I was getting somewhat better but still had some knee pain. I finally had an X-ray a week ago and the PA told me I should get an MRI. Her nurse telephoned to tell me my MRI is scheduled for this coming Friday. One hour later that same nurse telephoned to tell me my health insurer denied the MRI request.
I telephoned United Healthcare and spoke to Jackie who, after my long explanation she said that my problem was not her area of expertise. Jackie transferred me to Chelsea who took all my information and explanation and preceded to tell me she could not help me.  Chelsea transferred me to 'Carl' who listened to about half my story only to interrupt telling me he was NOT associated with any insurance company but was a parts manager for an auto dealership in South Alabama...I would NOT make up this crap. Finally, I got hold of Mary (United Healthcare) and she explained that my provider (Physician Assistant) failed to provide 'consistent published clinical evidence' to have the MRI.
I immediately called my Physician Assistant but she and her nurse took the afternoon off.
I went to the sporting goods store last night to purchase a 'leg-weight' machine...wish me luck!