While We Aged

Last Saturday, my wife and I attended an 80th birthday party for a teaching colleague of mine from those early years in Assumption, Illinois, which goes back 54-years. As we entered the front door of our friends home, we were greeted by somebody's young grandson who said to us, "The old people are in the backyard." A thought quickly rushed through my head; I notice other peoples' grandkids are NOT as cute as mine. As I walked through the house and open the sliding door to the backyard came another thought; the little turd blossom was right...I never saw so many old people in a backyard setting since visiting Mother Lucille at the Merdian Village Seniors' Aloha cookout.

When you hang around with old folks you realize just how much change we've all experienced. We all remember Doctor house calls and home milk deliveries. I'm sure in that crowd there was marble-shooters of the past and a fella or two who knows just how hard the homemade ice cream freezer-handle turns near the end.

All those backyard oldsters once sat in kitchens with linoleum floors and sat in autos watching gas station attendants 'service' their vehicle. Why those service station guys would even repair your flat tire. As I looked at the 70-year plus ladies gathered at the party I wondered how many took shorthand classes in high school and learned to type on a manual typewriter.

That little boy I met at the front door passed by with his cell phone...bet his granddad once played mumblety-peg with a pocket knife. I heard one lady ask the 'time' and not one fella pulled out a pocket watch to check but a nearby teenager looked at his cell phone and said, "Six-ten."

I must stop now. Poodle, Yodie just came downstairs and wants to go outside. After that exercise. I believe I sit a spell with him and drink another cup of coffee. If grandpa E.V. Bennett were alongside, he'd sit a bit, smoke his pipe and whittle.

....somethings ain't no more.

'Right for All'

In the mid-1970's I was umpiring a high school baseball game between Staunton and Gillespie. I recall a play that day which strikes a chord today. With base runners on board a ground ball hit the base-umpire and a delayed 'call' needed to be made. As I came from behind the plate to confer with the base-umpire, I remember my partner shouting to the two coaches running from their respective dugouts onto the field to begin pleading a case. He said to the mentors, "You guys go back to your benches, because me and my partner are going to talk an get it right."

These days, you and I have been inundated with political messages, opinions, spins and debate arguments and nothing would suggest that these political wannabe leaders have any desire to 'come together and GET IT RIGHT.' 'Right' in the eyes of political parties parallels the perspectives of two high school baseball coaches each of whom were looking for a self-serving outcome, which benefits them and theirs. Let's acknowledge the reality that our desires are driven by greed, power, fantasies and gratification.

Sadly, regardless who is elected President, we are conditioned to anticipate that the opposing party will spend time, energy and resources in opposition of all Presidntial efforts.

Apparently, 'for the good of the order' is an American myth.

Irony?

We Americans often embrace with condescending joy the criticism of other countries. We point fingers at countries that demean women and countries that perceive women as second-class. Perhaps we should self-examine regarding this issue.

In this 2016, United States Presidential election one candidate, a woman, is at the precipice of 'breaking the glass ceiling' thus becoming America's first female President. But WHOA NELLIE! The penises are about to 'wiggle' into the outcome.

Never in the history of our nation has the presidential campaigning discourse been so pathetically vulgar and laced with such low-life rhetoric as has this 2016 election. In the early going, Marco Rubio made a reference about the size of Donald Trump's hands and said, "You know what they say about a man with small hands...you can't trust them." Trump felt he needed to respond therefore he commented that his hands were not 'that' small and he does not 'have trouble in that department.' He said, "Believe me." Thank goodness no one asked for proof.

A recently released audio-tape of Trump saying he grabs womens' breasts and vagina's and kisses them at his will because he is a famous star, which gives him permission. On the heels of these comments a parade of women have come forward publicly to verify they were victims of Trump's sexual assault-groping. Trump then decided to counter these attacks by invoking Bill Clinton's past 'wee wee' activities.

As the election nears the final days, the FBI, which previously decided there was not evidence of wrongdoing with her private email server to bring charges against female candidate, Hillary Clinton, the FBI Director now releases a letter saying that it is going to examine 'new' pertinent emails.

Lo' and behold, if you follow the new email 'subject matter, we should not be surprised to learn that the new emails are connected to yet another man's penis? Well, they are! And believe it or not the man's name is WEINER.

November 9, 2016 American Newspaper headlines just might read: "Weiners' Dick-Tate Winner." Ps. As soon as this election is over, we Americans can begin our 'seasonal' watchdog duty of identifying those awful liberals who are saying 'Happy Holidays' instead of Merry Christmas...they want to take Christ out of Christmas! We can also remind all protesters: 'America, Love It Or Leave It.'

Be Prepared

Look, I am not imagining this crazy stuff; it's open public display. Megyn Kelly has reported death threats from Trump supporters as has GOP delegates, Jews, Muslims and an Arizona Newspaper. Just yesterday, I watched these words come from the lips of a Trump supporter being interviewed on television: "This is a revolution (referring to Trump's presidential candidacy) and we can change things at the ballot box or the bullet box." I'm not exactly certain what that means but it doesn't sound like rational talk.

Trump himself has said that he will accept the election results if he wins but will 'look at things if he is defeated.' That's not rational talk either but then again it's his normal.

With this new insane climate backdrop to an American election, which looks more and more like China or Russia many Americans are considering 'safe-places' to seek on Wednesday, November 9, the day after the election should Trump lose. Why not? Many Trump supporters are suggesting violence. A friend of my son, Chuck said he is considering hiding out at Barnes & Noble or the local Public Library. Make your own deduction here.

I am told others are approaching this dilemma ruling out places not to go. Don't go to an elementary school. Stay away from public eateries and shopping malls. Don't be near an abortion center or planned parenthood facilities. And given the fact that Trump has the evangelical vote the Church Sanctuary may not be a sanctuary.

I've got my game plan. Two weeks ago, I purchased one of those red baseball caps, which reads: "Make America Great Again." You see, no matter who wins, this old boy is wearing that cap November 9 and until the dust settles.

Love My Mornings

Many years ago, I had a mentor suggest to me that I should wake up each morning and immediately do something unpleasant to myself and the rest of the day would likely be better. Well, since I could not bring myself to gulp a goldfish or stick my finger in a light socket, I gave up on that idea.

I do understand the philosophy behind getting bad things out of the way as quickly as you can so they do not linger and mentally bring you down. I guess that was in the back of my mind this past Tuesday  morning when I asked my wife to go with me to the Macon County Offices and cast our 2016 voting ballot. That's correct, we voted for all our least offensive political candidates. When I got home I took a shower...felt good.

Actually, my mornings start the same. At approximately 5:30AM, Toy Poodle Yodie awakens and leaves his foot of the bed sleeping spot to stretch and make his way to my head where he does that pooch head-to-head-scent-swap with the old man. We then make our way downstairs and outside for the morning relief. Once finished with business and perimeter yard walk-sniffing, we head for the house for a dental stick treat.
(Note: I've been known to relieve myself outside but I've never sniffed the fence line...just thought I should clarify.)
The pup heads back up stairs to sleep another hour with his 'mother' while I post a blog, check blood sugar numbers, read the newspapers and surf the television channels to hear all the Donald Trump surrogates explain what Trump 'really' meant saying the things he said the day before and twittered during the night.

About 8:00AM, I take breakfast upstairs to the master bedroom where my wife and I watch a bit of The Today Show and discuss the days plans. At some point the relaxing time is interrupted by Yodie who jumps from the bed and begins growling and raking his back leg...signaling he wants be fed.
I go back downstairs where I prepare the dog's food, which is usually baked chicken or fish along with sweet potatoes or green beans mixed with his dry dog food. (Please, no snide comments about the dog's menu). After eating, the pup heads back to bed and In get dressed. Before too long, the pup finds me either in my office or family room. He once again growls and rakes. When I ask, "Whata you want?" He heads off towards the formal living room. Our living room is used twice a year by guests: Thanksgiving & Christmas. However, it is used twice daily by Yodie and me as we floor-wrestle in a tug-a-war game over a rubber duck.

Late morning, I have a third cup of coffee and head to the back yard bench to soak up sunshine...you got it...it's a two cushion bench and both cushions are used. Get a pup and I guarantee it will help you survive the human crap & chaos.

It Starts At Home

The satisfactions I have experienced in life has little to do with material possessions or accomplishments but seemingly everything to do with relationships. When I lay awake at night awaiting sleep or find that 'alone moment' of retrospect, my thoughts often return to core thinking, which began to crystallize as a child...yours does also. If ever there is unsettled issues or relationship problems all else I seek has limitations.

The unlocking of my life's journey towards satisfaction began with open discourse with my mother, that person who gave life. I did not always agree with her thoughts and philosophies but those differences were secondary to our primary parent-child relationship bond. Thoughts of my father always conjure up perceptions of a role model-hero, yet his expectations of me were healthy. He did not want my kudos and likewise did not excuse my short-comings and missteps. I have frequently told young people to focus on the 'messages' from parents and not the voice volume or the possible judgmental tone. Too often youngsters feel a need to defend.

I thank God for the early revelation to respect elders and 'honor my mother and father.' I am happy that I was able to measure the differences with parents as part of life's unique journey and NOT a war, which must have a winner and loser. The inner joy and piece with parents always kept my potential for satisfaction unlocked and in high gear.

Win Every Battle

I was in the Walmart checkout line the other day and directly behind me was a mother with two young children. I suppose the boy was four years old and his little sister was likely two or three. The lad was pitching a hissy-fit because he wanted a candy bar, which his mother would not purchase and the little girl was screaming and hitting her mother's leg for unknown reasons. About that time a teen girl approached the lady and said, "Mom, I'm going with some friends to McDonald's." The mother pleaded that she needed help with the groceries but the teen daughter ignored her mother and left with two friends. I had the urge to grab the keys from the teenage daughter and tell her she'd be meeting friends after a two weeks grounding then I would have told her to take her sister to the auto. After that, I would have swatted that five year old boy on his butt.

Driving home, I could not help but think about Tom Brokaw's book, 'The Greatest Generation.' That was his book profiling my parents' generation. The generation that won World War II and re-built an industrial America. Along the way those people raised children that understood 'no' because mom and dad 'said so.' Those parents did not spare the rod nor did they fail to explain stated expected behavior-responsibilities of their kids and the kids knew consequences.

What has happened to the parenting model in 21st Century America? Could it be that along the generational parenting journey while mommies and daddies were attempting to 'give' their children a 'better' life than that which they experienced, today's parents fail to make the distinction between 'better' and 'easier.' I hear a lot of parents say when it comes to parenting, "I pick my battles." My philosophy was 'I win all battles thus I win the war.'

Actually, I note many parents are very good friends with their kids and their kids' friends. I never wanted to be friends with my kids until we had some things in common: like a mortgage payment, monthly bills and children. That plan worked out good...today, I am friends with my children.

My wife and I raised one narcissistic tyrant>>>James Wilkerson Yoder...Toy Poodle 'Yodie.'