Cannot Imagine

There is nothing greater than trauma that begs for the human touch and interaction. I don't know if that need is nourished while the child is yet in the womb sensing the mother's heart beat or if it is a postnatal learn behavior.

This thought brings me to one of the most heartbreaking human experiences I can imagine, the act of dying alone . I have always been troubled with that scenario; it eats at my gut. This is the reason I insisted on being bedside when my maternal grandmother, Mammy Bennett passed, when my father took his final breath and when my mother left her earthly journey. I could not endure the thought of those people who were such a foundational and integral part of my life would face death alone. I had to be with them, I had to hold their hand just in case they might know.

This brings me to today's difficult circumstances around the coronavirus. Because this virus is so highly contagious, people who are at death's door must be isolated and therefore family members are not permitted to be at their bedside; their loved one dies alone. Family cannot orchestrate a normal funeral visitation or burial where friends and family can pay respects and say their goodbyes.

Let me share with you...When my father's cardiovascular team told the family that nothing more could be done to reverse his heart failure, my dad knew he would die shortly. I telephoned my good doctor friend, James Green to specifically ask questions about the physical pattern of death. He shared a few perspectives then made one thing clear as he stated, "It is believed that even people in a coma may still be able to hear voices, therefore keep talking to your dad during your vigil." My wife Gerry and I laid across his bed and spoke softly to him. At a point in time he began mumbling a repeated phrase, "Oh boy, oh boy, I can't get there..." over and over he said those words and over and over I told him, "You can get there Dad and it's okay to go, it's okay, mom will be fine." He finally got to that place in the wee-hours of the morning and though I was resolved to let him go, I still to this day wish I could talk baseball with my hero.

To those individuals who dare suggest that a senior's life is somehow less important than the economy, I pray for you for you are a godless and heartless person who knows not the love Jesus Christ commanded us to give.. My prayer for you is specific, I pray that you not face death alone. Understand, death is inevitable, it will come to all...just not today, not alone and never for money.

Share Joy and Happiness in Difficult Times

In my retirement years, I often reflect on those many wonderful people in my past and the incredible times shared and wonder 'where did the time go?' During these coronavirus shut-in times, perhaps you as I spend more moments reflecting on our past experiences and folks who intersected our journey. I often find myself wishing that I had taken more time in those past moments to truly embrace and enjoy unique events and special relationships. Seemingly, too often the perceived achievment demands rob you and I of the 'now' enjoyment.

With today's difficult social circumstances, we can find ourselves reminiscing too much about the past and worrying far too much about tomorrow, which again steals away the moment's joy. That's correct, I did say "joy." We must remind ourselves that amidst this world wide virus pandemic, which keeps us from up close human interaction, we need not give way to negative thinking. We are not paralyzed and unable to share our caring love if we make positive choices. God grants us opportunities to reach out and touch lives of family, friends and total strangers. Be grateful to have the Internet, facebook and cell phones to exchange thoughts, feelings, face time and love of others.

Recently, I  decided how much money that my wife and I might spend going out to dine or other entertainment options and use those un-spent monies to donate to needed causes; and I have done that regularly. I seize moments each day to exercise, play with my pup, exchange deep and casual conversations with my wife. I also make it a point to telephone a couple of friends or family members to check on them. I wish them to know my concern because I have that concern. I also reach out with these blog writings even though some may disagree with my opinions or comments, I still engage.

As God intended, I must use this time to share the gift of love and enjoy my moments.

"I have noticed that most people in this world are about as happy as they have made up their minds to be."   Abe Lincoln

Misses The Mark Daily

I assume that the daily White House Coronavirus Task Force Briefing is designed to desimminate  information regarding the status of the infection rate, updates on medical provisions being provided and lift the spirits of Americans. When these meetings actually shake-out a bit of that is forthcoming but due to the pathetic communication skills of President Donald Trump, we hear repeated self-aggrandizing back-slapping, repetition of simpleton phrases and verbal meandering mumble-jumble boastful poppycock.

 Trump is predictable in that he will not only exonerate himself of any missteps but will blame former President Barrack  Obama's administration. Watching Trump's infantile exhibition reinforces Former Secretary State,  Rex Tillerson's characterization of Trump when describing him as a "moron" and former Secretary of Defense, General James Mattis' follow up describing Trump as "having the understanding of a sixth grader." This President is incapable of showing empathy while at the same time making ugly comments about Joe Biden, George W. Busch and Obama. The man relishes in his professional-wrestling rally-rhetoric.

The briefings always have those moments when Trump makes unsubstantiated medical claims regarding the treatment or trajectory of the virus and then medical infectious expert, Dr. Anthony Fauci steps to the microphone and attempts to tactfully 'set the information straight' for the American people without saying President Trump is once again 'talking-out-of-his-ass.'

Then there is Vice President Mike 'Lurch' Pence who stands nearby with his 'Pa Kettle deadpan expression' awaiting his role to blow smoke up Trump's derrière and reminding Americans of the President's cleanliness points on the little placard.

Trump's recent messaging points to his determination to send people back to their jobs hoping to pump up the economy in spite of the terrible consequences. His half-baked theory is that many areas of the country do not reflect the virus magnitude seen in New York City, Los Angeles, Florida and Washington State. The game plan is to rank all American counties as "high risk, moderate risk and low risk." After determining the extent of County activities, the low risk counties are to use good judgment and not go into high risk counties. If State governors don't see the fallicy in that, we are doomed.

This President is in over his head but to self-absorbed to realize it, meanwhile tragedies unfold from sea to saddened sea.

Time To Be Smart

Common sense suggests that should I have a medical issue, I would be best served to visit and take the advice of my family doctor or a medical specialist rather than seeking the opinion of my banker or realtor. If I'm being sued by another perhaps I would be wise to retain the services of an attorney rather than ask the opinion of my mailman or barber.

Why then would anybody in their right mind, in the midst of a world wide pandemic, listen to the opinion of a politician or a hotel owner regarding any aspect of establishing guidelines and parameters in fighting the escalation of the infection virus?

I surely understand President Donald Trump's frustration regarding the coronavirus' derailment of a healthy economy, which would put him in good stead for his re-election, but come on...we as a nation MUST listen to the infectious disease experts about following a plan to eleminate the deaths of our American neighbors caused by this horrible disease. At least, I would like to believe in an America that values life more than money. If not then we've lost our way as a Christian nation and as a country that proports the value of human life, which our service men and women died for through the decades. I cannot imagine how this is debatable.

Finally, I note that my personal life has been de-valued by many right-wing politicians, their supporters and political pundits who openly suggest that my generation's hasten death during this coronavirus would benefit an economic comeback.

Please read the words found in Scripture >2 Timothy 3:1-5...
          "But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty.
           For people will become lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive,
           disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous,
           without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit,
           lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness
           but denying its power.

I am warned to, "Avoid such people." I conclude it unwise to elect them as leaders!
         

Making the Best out of a Bad Situation

It is springtime 2020 and nearly a third of America's population is staying inside their homes in an effort to slow the spread of a deadly coronavirus, which has engulfed over 140 countries and caused thousands of deaths. We have seen public schools close nationwide along with shut downs of restaraunts, theaters, concerts, professional sports and hundreds of thousands of businesses. Fair to say these are scary times, uncertain times, frustrating times and emotionally and psychologically stressful times.

It is true that the phrase 'social distancing' has become a universal plea if not cry. The behavior of separating ourselves from people is against our nature. Most normal people thrive on social contact and activities, which are traits of a healthy individual and society.

On a personal note, my wife, Gerry and I are staying home and doing our part to socially distance ourselves. The most frustrating of that commitment sacrifice is not engaging and interacting with our family. We have three married children, fifteen grand children, three of whom are married and three great-grandchildren. That totals 27-family members. On March 8, we returned to Decatur, Illinois after a two month hiatus in Florida. While in the sunshine state, we did share a three day visit with two granddaughters but aside from that brief get together, we have not visited with family since Christmas 2019. This is uncharacteristic of the Roustio Clan.

Well, last evening we had a chance to scratch a bit of that family-contact itch. Granddaughter, Lindsay orchestrated a video chat meeting with all family members and one boy friend close to joining the family. This was challenging especially when one considers old folks like my wife and me who had to be 'walked' through the iPad Internet button pushing maze.

We finally had the mass meeting hook up and it was fun if not crazy but also sad because under these uncertain times we cannot meet in person and embrace one another. But...kudos to all. We'll do it again because we intend to make the best out of a bad situation.
(Touch)
Make The Best of a Bad Situation

Time Will Tell

Most every individual I know has experienced hard times and good times. There are a few people in my journey, which I noticed seem to always ride high on good fortune while a few seemingly face one hurdle after another.

Many people believe hard times become fertile ground to create strong-good men/women. My understanding of history tells me that theory does have credence, however history also makes the case for hard times creating strong bad men/women. In our own nation's history we note the hard times of a Revolutionary War, Civil War and Depression created opportunities for strong-good men to rise to significant challenges and the likes of George Washington, Abe Lincoln and FDR met the moments and created good.

Economic depressions in Germany and Italy offered similar challenges and strong men in those countries seized the opportunities. Those men, Adolph Hitler and Benito Mussolini became powerful and did bad works. Finally, American Colonial Days were indeed hard times  and strong leaders did bad things when they enacted the legalization of human slavery to shore up an economy. Bad things happened to good people for a long time.

What becomes obvious is the simple conclusion that hard times will find individuals or nations choosing and the choice is either to do good or do bad. Before that choice is made the individual or nation must confront the four realities of our human experience, which are greed, fear, stupidity and hate.

In the year 2020, over 140 nations and thousands of leaders are facing hard times. I wonder, how will the history books read? Specifically, how American history unfold?
Meanwhile, I'm left to consider G. Michael Hopf's quote:

                                         Hard times create strong men,
                                         Strong men create good times.
         
                                         Good times create weak men,
                                         Weak men create hard times.
                             

A Trump Rally in Disguise

In a relatively intelligent society, Donald Trump's insatiable apeitite for publicity and praise reinforcement would do him a great disservice. During WWII, President Franklin D. Roosevelt limited his public interaction which gave greater credence to his words when he did hold fireside chats or radio addresses. The public still got information from others during those uncertain times.

Donald Trump has a personal documented history for calling newspapers and disguising his voice pretending to be someone else with information about and to promote Donald Trump. He loved seeing his name in print reporting about his business dealings.

During this coronavirus pandemic, President Trump cannot hold his political rallies because of the mandate to keep gatherings under ten people and the plea from medical experts to keep social distancing. Trump's itch and need to boast about himself and praise his decisions publicly is thus met daily as he leads a coronavirus team with updates. Trump talks primarily about how wonderful the 'team' is doing and in particularly repeats what he believes are 'things' he personally has done to address the pandemic. Trump also uses these pandemic updates to toss the raw meat to his base supporters who need to be reminded of "fake news," conspiracy theories and the ever popular hate rehetoric about minorities and certainly a few daggers at the 'Black President' that preceded him. It works with the simple minded haters. The reported bullying and physical attacks on Chinese-Americans has increased recently since Trump constantly refers to the coronavirus as "The Chinese Virus." Trump can also attack reporters who ask tough questions, especially those representing news outlets other than Fox News.  He takes mean-spirited tongue-in-cheek shots at the likes of Mitt Romney who voted against Trump during the impeachment hearings. Sadly, Trump's negative innuendo towards GOP Senator Romney came when a reporter asked Trump about Romney's self-quarantine due to exposure to the coronavirus. Ugly non-Christian inferences from Trump seems to please Evangelicals.

The digestive result works for Trump and it works because it feeds the appetite of many Trump supporters, who believe that most things bad, which happen in their lives is caused by people of color, 'foreigners,' minorities and immigrants.

How Did I Get So Many Jobs?

Previously, I have spoken to this ever-growing self-service false show and pretense of customer-service. Certainly, most Americans (about 56%)  are smart enough to understand that the self-service concept is driven by corporate profiteering through the simple practice of convincing consumers that if they would do the work of their laid-off employees, you (customer) will buy for less and complete transactions faster. How's that working out?

Now that I automatically put gasoline in my own auto, clean the windshield and walk to the inside counter to get my receipt, which seldom dispenses at the pump, I can drive around near the overpriced car wash and put air in my tire for a buck fifty. I can also self-checkout out at most stores. It just keeps getting easier and easier for we gullible folks. The fact that I am not employed at any of these places of business, I none-the-less work for them.

The topper 'work-for-no-pay' happened this past week. I am now a non-paid employee for the federal government under legal obligation and threat of fines or imprisonment. Two days ago, I received by mail a mandated explanation of how to go online and complete for the Feds my household census information. It was clearly stated that I was required by law to do this job. I remember years past when a paid employee of the United States government used to knock on doors, ask questions and complete the form. I now do his job. And by the way, if you put any stock in future census numbers and stats your damn right goofy.

I'd continue this rant but I gotta run back to Walmart. I just remembered that I failed to put my shopping cart back in the cart corral and they got those survalliance cameras...there may be a law against that.

Makes Absolutely No Sense

The coronavirus is on the precipice of running amuck in the United States. This highly infectious disease is changing the daily habits of American people from sea to shinning sea.

The government leadership has lagged in its response because our President along with many corporate leaders think first (always) about money before considering welfare. In spite of this leadership ineptness, we note airlines cutting back services, State Governors imposing 'lockdowns' and calling upon event managers to cancel large gathering events. Even some school districts are taking an attendance recess.

This brings me to the question of response inconsistencies. The NCAA men's basketball tournament is to begin soon. Only the Ivy League has canceled their men's and women's tournament leading up the the NCAA playoffs. Recently, the NCAA announced that their tournament will not be canceled.

If this highly communicable disease is as life threatening as it appears and it is paramount to control it then there must be a universal orchestration to protect our citizens. If the games MUST be played then play them...but for the sake of consistency and the preservation of life...lock the crowds out!

These are the thoughts and comments of a man who played the game, coached the game, loves the game and bleeds St. Louis Cardinals red.

I Wish For Them

Preparing to head back North to Illinois after a two month Florida 'winter' hiatus, I thought about the coming summer months...always my favorite season. As I recall vividly those carefree long summer days of my youth, I have noted that my grandchildren's generation seemingly functions with a different modus operandi and consequently they experience a much darker and different youth. I observe today's youth less carefree and more anxious; I read reports of more young people medicated for anxiety and depression and I sadly learn recently that the youth suicide rate increased 56% over the past decade. What has happened to 'carefree youth days?' This summer, I will notice empty sandlots, unmarked sidewalks and quiet evenings absence of  young voices calling out others.

I read magazine articles documenting facts underscoring the current state of medicated youth who are embroiled in growing anxiety and depression. Today's youth unlike any before them are constantly exposed to mass media negative news. Our youth is exposed far too early to the adult world of harsh reality and sexuality issues. These kids spend too much time indoors embracing an unhealthy sedentary life style as they imprison themselves with a fear of social engagement. Many fear harm at school and feel they don't fit in with peers. Now we add to these fears an uncertainty about communicable diseases and our nation's readiness.

Make no mistake, young and old alike have reason to have great concerns about economic security, taking on debt, acts of senseless violence and the future of our planet. However, we must not allow fears of that which is out of our control to poison the joys, which await those who would dare dream of exploring personal qualities, embracing family, sharing love, seeking happiness and serving those with needs.

I am convinced that life's challenges and hurdles are greater in our minds than in reality.

It Can Be Fixed

For the past several years, high school athletic administrators across the country are bemoaning the shortage of game officials. Many lay the blame at the feet of what they identify as "Parents' bad behavior." I would think that anybody familiar with youth sports would readily agree that today's parents often times demonstrate poor sportsmanship and are frequently the cause when physical confrontations occurred. We have see documented video evidence.

I would not argue that some bad behaving parents are responsible for some game officials' shortages but I believe there are others to share equal blame for that shortage. I would add to the equation the  school district administrations, State Athletic Associations and coaches.

Please consider this overview:
 Parents are obviously dripping with emotional passion when attending their child's sporting event. No parent believes they gave birth to mediocre abilities. That said, keep in mind that parents at some time may wish to ask the coach's about their kid's play. Coaches are often put off by a parent asking a question. This is where a proactive high school administrator insists that the athletic department has a universal one-time parent-coach-student athlete conversation engagement process. That process is fully explained to the Board of Education, which signs off and thereafter refuses to entertain athletic   matters with parents but refer them to the 'process.'  Most parents telephone a coach and ask to talk  with them without the kid's knowledge. This process insists on the kid's attendance at this meeting. The communication guidelines do not permit a conversation about any players other than the parents' child. Note: This meeting will address the parents burning question, 'why is my child not getting  more playing time?' The coach should keep the player centered in the conversation. There is not a second meeting option. At the meetings conclusion the coach should ask the athlete if he/she is comfortable remaining as a member of the team.

The State Athletic Association is also a critical player in addressing the shrinking numbers of game officials. The Association can and should be proactive in this crisis. First, the State Association should host a yearly weekend officials' clinic for every sport offered under its canopy. That clinic weekend can offer refresher testing, rules interpretation and offciating mechanics. The Association should also require journeymen officials to agree to critique a young starting official three times during that sport's season before the journeymen official can qualify for a state tournament officiating assignments.

Good officiating begins with rules knowledge and shored by proper field/floor coverage, decisive mechanics and game management as it pertains to the official's response to players, coaches and fans. Beginning officials will grow in confidence with journeymen officials' guidance.

Finally, school districts would be wise to host a parent's night prior to the start each sport season  where a myriad of factors focused on providing a positive sport experience for all parties would be presented.

Footnote: Removing a obnoxious, vulgar and unruly fan from a high school event and barring that individual for the remainder of the season remainder of the season sends a no-nonsense message.

Can We Talk?

The situation of being in the company of other people is becoming more strange and unfamiliar in this 21st century of advanced technology, fears and general social apathy. I truly believe our interpersonal relationship and communication skills are being less developed.

Let me define what most agree to be interpersonal relationship and communication skills. The first thing that comes to mind is one's ability and interest to listen to others. The ability to grasp the 'feeling' being expressed. Then there is the teamwork skill required to embrace a cause. A healthy  and a thriving society requires individuals, at times to sacrifice self for the group. The skills of responsibility and dependability are intertwined but are traits, which satisfy expectations essential for the good of the order in every society. Leadership skills motivate the masses to be in a common agreement while skills of flexibility and patience go hand-in-hand and aids in the necessity of a society to understand the importance to feel and express empathy. These aforementioned traits are not a gift at birth but can only be developed as one interacts with others.

So, what's the problem? Well, the problem is withdrawal. As a society, we are engaging less and less and consequently we are not placing ourselves in interaction developmental situations. We have become prisoners of  reclusiveness due to our fascination with and the convenience found in technology along with our fears of real and perceived dangers. This results in the crippling of interpersonal communication skills and naturally leads to relationship apathy, misunderstanding and intolerance.

We use our computer technology to order online consumable goods; everything from groceries, clothing, appliances to a plethora of endless items. We seldom need to interact with another human being. The once found frustration having to 'self-serve' has become an accepted reality. Likewise, we do not expect to hear a 'real' person when seeking many needs via the telephone; we are prepared to listen carefully to the automation voices and respond touching the proper keys. As parents we feel fearful of the many dangers facing unchaperoned children, therefore unlike parents of yesterday who said, "Go play outside," parents today feel more comfortable with children inside! Inside where kids are not communicating or managing their interactive play with others and developing leadership and teamwork skills as those opportunities emerge.

Even as a baseball fan, I find myself now disenchanted with all the sabermetrics used to analyze the game. I guess I should take more advanced computer education classes as it pertains to the empirical analysis of baseball; thus I could take my computer to the game, enter the numbers as the game progresses and later when I return home, I can crunch those numbers to determine if I saw a good game or not!