Tuesday, October 23, 2018

A Sweet Flashback

My wife baked four coffee cakes yesterday, which caused me to reminisce about my late mother in-law, Vi Bischof. What's the coffee cake connection to my mother in-law? Simple fact that the recipes were Vi's. Viola Hopfinger was one year old when her hometown, St. Louis, Missouri hosted the 1904 World's Fair. She died 81-years later on October 27, which is this Saturday when grandson, Caleb Howell will marry Morgan Fernandes.

I don't believe I ever met a woman who sacrificed anymore for their family than did Vi. She raised six children and on her husband's modest income as a home-delivery milk truck driver. She took in washing and ironing, never new the luxury of an automobile or family vacation and made personal concessions to send all her children to private Catholic schools.

Vi could be gruff but as they say, her bark was far worse than her bite. I'm sure from day one (and I dated her daughter, Gerry for seven years) she look at me with skepticism, after all I was a foot taller than anybody in her family, I didn't drink beer as did her husband and older sons and perhaps the greatest suspicion came from not playing poker not to mention that I was Methodist.

The woman suffered un-imaginable heartache. Her husband died unexpectedly at age 54. Her second oldest son would died suddenly of a massive heart attack at age 41. Eight months later her oldest son age 42 died of septic shock after routine surgery. Pause for a moment and 'walk in those moccasins.'

After her husband's death, Vi lived for a time with her oldest daughter and son in-law and she also lived alone for a period. In the her later years, Vi began a monthly rotation living arrangement with three of her adult children and their respective spouses. Those were particularly good years for Vi, her adult kids and spouses and most certainly her grandchildren. A special bonding was evident.

One of VI's favorite expressions was, "I heyda-say but..." That line was forthcoming when Vi actually couldn't wait to say what was on her mind. I recall shortly after her daughter, Gerry and I married, we took Vi to the movies and Gerry broke the news to her mother that she was soon going to have breast surgery to remove a fibroid cyst. Upon hearing that news, Vi spoke, "Well, I heyda-say but she didn't have no whatchacalitt cyst before she married." I loved the woman's subltleness...and believe me both Vi's coffee cake recipes and her DNA subtleness are alive and well today.

I'll stop now...gunna have some coffee cake, it's great.

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