Yer Out!

Baseball umpiring is NOT an easy-to-do activity. It is especially challenging for the 'home-plate-umpire' who must make a judgment call on nearly 200 pitches per game. Then there can be those weired and unexpected 'plays' or sudden 'bang-bang' plays; it ain't easy umpiring baseball. From 1970 through 1981, I umpire high school and college baseball. I suppose that I umpired for a couple of reasons: (1) Baseball was always my first love and as a former pitcher, I was always a control-freak and consequently found baseball umpiring an arena-release, (2), I believed that I was 'good' umpiring and (3), I could always use a few extra bucks. In 1978, I umpired the Division II World Series.

As an umpire, I swam against the current. I'll explain. If you watch much professional baseball you will notice most umpires have a very small strike zone, which favors the hitter because it sells more tickets to the desires of the baseball-knowledge challenged fan who cannot appreciate low scoring games. Baseball games with scores of 1o-to-8 with 23 base hits four home runs and nine pitching changes  takes longer to play, which allows more beer sales; the only down side is drunks falling out of the upper deck in the seventh inning. I called the 'rule-book' strike zone!!!

Some funny stuff happens on the baseball diamond. I recall umpiring a high school game  (late 1970's) at Cahokia, Illinois with East St. Louis. Entering the top of the seventh (last) inning, East St. Louis trailed host Cahokia 7-4 when East St. Louis put the first two batters on base with no outs. Are you ready to follow the unexpected? The next East Side batter blasted a pitch headed for the centerfield fence. As the Cahokia outfielder turned and raced towards the fly ball, both runners were off and running to third and second bases respectively; in fact each runner had rounded those bases when the Cahokia outfielder made a phenomenal over-the-shoulder' catch. The runner who had rounded second retraced his steps and was returning to first base when the relay throw from the outfield to the shortstop doubled up the runner at first base. NOTE: WE SUDDENLY HAVE TWO OUTS! I then noticed the runner who rounded third base had returned to second but as his teammate is put out at first this runner at second begins to 'run-towards' home plate directly OVER the pitchers mound (I shit you not). The Cahokia first baseman threw the ball home to his catcher who watches the East St. Louis runner slide by his tag. Of course I bellowed, "You're OUT!" The runner jumped to his feet claiming he was not tagged and he was correct; he was NOT tagged. I explained to the boy that he ran out of the base path but he insisted that he had 'touched third base once and did not need to run  there AGAIN!' Some kids never grasp the rules of play; their thinking is ass backwards!