Think Before You Speak

I have one thing in common with Toy Poodle, Yodie...we both need to avoid liquids after 6PM. When the pup avoids liquid intake he sleeps the night through and if I avoid liquids, I likely only walk my enlarged prostate to the 'John' three times a night instead of six.
My doctor told me that old farts, like me, often exasperate the late night urinating frequency because of anxiety. "  "You should think relaxing thoughts while standing before the commode," said the Doc.
The other night while waiting for things to begin, I found my sleepy-eyed thoughts take word-form while standing before the throne...I spoke saying, "Come little fella do your thing." I have no idea why I said those words aloud. Of course my wife, lying in bed, heard me talking. She yelled, " Who are you talking to?" I said, "An old friend you once knew." She did NOT think the comment was funny.