I would surely forget most New Year's resolutions should I 'make a list.' Instead, I shall make one resolution for 2013: I will pray each morning for 'tolerance.' Here is how I view my desire for improvement needs: If I could just gain masterful tolerance of circumstances and people, I would be happier and at personal peace, not to mention a step closer to the 'golden gates.'
Greater tolerance could: (1) 'Open' my mind to other viewpoints. (2) Make me incline to compromise. (3) Allow me greater forbearance, which would give me patience with others. (4) Unlatch inhibitions and give permission to indulge in the potential humor found so easily in our journey. (5) Create empathy and sympathy within me and thus lead me towards greater benevolence and an attitude of charity. (6) Finally, summon a greater grace, understanding and compassion for me towards humanity.
My goodness, if only I could truly conquer the negative energy that stands between me and 'tolerance,' I would be in a peaceful tranquillity with untold abilities and strengths to make my world and those near me better.
My wife suggests that I vow this New Year to stop using any profanity. I do say my share of 'bad' words because I cannot tolerate greedy and hypocritical people, which often causes my nasty rants. So...you can certainly see how this accomplishment of greater tolerance in 2013, could be a win for me and my wife; pray for me!
Happy New Year!
Monday, December 31, 2012
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Act Now; Be Free
"Weary" best describes my mind and body. Although, I am at peace with my Mother's death, I am none the less emotionally and physically tired from the past week's demands of the Christmas-time grandfather role and the posturing expectations of the eldest son at his Mother's wake and funeral services. I have paused to offer humble thanks for the sustaining strength.
I know that many who read my blog also sent emails, telephone messages and sympathy notes and I thank you for those sincere expressions and kind thoughts. Each of us must face the loss of family and we all could embrace the moment with a celebratory spirit then push ahead in our own journey.
I am truly grateful for the longevity I enjoyed with my parents and the sharing-relationships of my wife, children and grandchildren with my parents.
I wish to tell a brief story, which resonates so vividly. When I was perhaps eight or nine years-old, my maternal grandmother, 'Mammy' was reading some scriptures to her 'not very' interested grandson. She demanded that I pay attention to Deuteronomy 5:16..."Honor your father and mother as the Lord God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land your God is giving you." Mammy then said, "Let me explain what it means, 'it may go well with you;' if you do not honor your mother and father, upon their deaths you will have many regrets that will be a cross to bear and a pain to suffer all of your days." I heeded my Mammy's words and today, I can say with no doubts, I never disrespected nor cursed my parents; instead I gave honor unto them.
I am free the remainder of my life to call upon all those precious memories and special times shared with my Mom and Dad;I have no woulda-coulda thoughts of regret! My hope for those who may read this blog is that they might take a moment to erase any angry words standing in the pathway of such freedom. I hope that a conversation with children would be urgent.
I tell you this: Before the wake visitation for my Mother ended, I gathered all my grandchildren together in the parlor of Valhalla Funeral Home and told them the story that I just shared with you.
I know that many who read my blog also sent emails, telephone messages and sympathy notes and I thank you for those sincere expressions and kind thoughts. Each of us must face the loss of family and we all could embrace the moment with a celebratory spirit then push ahead in our own journey.
I am truly grateful for the longevity I enjoyed with my parents and the sharing-relationships of my wife, children and grandchildren with my parents.
I wish to tell a brief story, which resonates so vividly. When I was perhaps eight or nine years-old, my maternal grandmother, 'Mammy' was reading some scriptures to her 'not very' interested grandson. She demanded that I pay attention to Deuteronomy 5:16..."Honor your father and mother as the Lord God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land your God is giving you." Mammy then said, "Let me explain what it means, 'it may go well with you;' if you do not honor your mother and father, upon their deaths you will have many regrets that will be a cross to bear and a pain to suffer all of your days." I heeded my Mammy's words and today, I can say with no doubts, I never disrespected nor cursed my parents; instead I gave honor unto them.
I am free the remainder of my life to call upon all those precious memories and special times shared with my Mom and Dad;I have no woulda-coulda thoughts of regret! My hope for those who may read this blog is that they might take a moment to erase any angry words standing in the pathway of such freedom. I hope that a conversation with children would be urgent.
I tell you this: Before the wake visitation for my Mother ended, I gathered all my grandchildren together in the parlor of Valhalla Funeral Home and told them the story that I just shared with you.
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
He's Family
As a kid growing up, I do not recall a time when our family did not have a dog. During fifty-two married-years, Gerry and I only failed to have a dog six of those years. Our current canine is 'James Wilkerson Yoder,' a four-year old, seven pound white Toy Poodle. We purchased 'Yodie' from an Amish family in Arthur, Illinois. I assumed their name was Yoder thus the naming of our little boy.
A succinct description of Yodie's living-style was recently delivered by our 81-year old brother-in law who asked his children to never place him in a nursing home but ship him to Mel & Gerry's where he might receive the care 'that pup gets.'
Our breed of dogs over the years have run the pooch spectrum. However, since the early 1970's our choice of breed favors the 'Poodle' for three reasons: They do not shed hair, they are hypo-allergenic and finally they are a very intelligent breed. Actually, I have always preferred 'big' dogs but my wife likes the smaller pup. If she could she would get a Tea Cup breed but I fear for the safety of such a little dog. In any case, I finally agreed to buy the toy poodle for my wife; it would be her dog. That game plan went to hell-in-a-hand-basket soon! I will confess that I am absolutely crazy about Yodie.
Yodie is kept in a supply of rubber ducks (Mallard paint markings) by a former East St. Louis baseball teammate of mine who lives in Springfield, Missouri near the original Bass Pro Shop, which stock the seven dollar ducks. The duck serves a significant purpose in our relationship. Yodie wishes for me to attempt taking the duck from him...this growl tug-of-war game plays out in about 10 minutes three times a day. The dog follows me around and should I end up at this computer, Yodie finds me, stands at my feet growling until I push my chair back so that he may jump into my lap and watch the letters appear on the screen as I type them. Yodie sleeps between us and like clock-work, each night when getting into bed hearranges a small white teddy bear with its nose in his mouth and front paws wrapped around the bears head.
My wife and I have always been soft-hearted for God's creatures. The most significant contribution a dog makes in the human relationship experience is the pure blue-print-demonstration of 'unconditional-love.' I am convinced that if all the world's Heads-of-State were women and everybody was required to own a dog there would be no wars and no domestic violence!
I shall never forget a time when a basketball fan was giving me some crap as I walked from the court after coaching a game. I spun around and in a stern scolding voice-finger pointing, I said, "Listen you jerk, I have a dog at home waiting for me and he thinks that I am the greatest; I am NOT seeking any second opinions!" I have no idea what prompted my comment; suffice to say that my adversary was dumb-founded!
A succinct description of Yodie's living-style was recently delivered by our 81-year old brother-in law who asked his children to never place him in a nursing home but ship him to Mel & Gerry's where he might receive the care 'that pup gets.'
Our breed of dogs over the years have run the pooch spectrum. However, since the early 1970's our choice of breed favors the 'Poodle' for three reasons: They do not shed hair, they are hypo-allergenic and finally they are a very intelligent breed. Actually, I have always preferred 'big' dogs but my wife likes the smaller pup. If she could she would get a Tea Cup breed but I fear for the safety of such a little dog. In any case, I finally agreed to buy the toy poodle for my wife; it would be her dog. That game plan went to hell-in-a-hand-basket soon! I will confess that I am absolutely crazy about Yodie.
Yodie is kept in a supply of rubber ducks (Mallard paint markings) by a former East St. Louis baseball teammate of mine who lives in Springfield, Missouri near the original Bass Pro Shop, which stock the seven dollar ducks. The duck serves a significant purpose in our relationship. Yodie wishes for me to attempt taking the duck from him...this growl tug-of-war game plays out in about 10 minutes three times a day. The dog follows me around and should I end up at this computer, Yodie finds me, stands at my feet growling until I push my chair back so that he may jump into my lap and watch the letters appear on the screen as I type them. Yodie sleeps between us and like clock-work, each night when getting into bed hearranges a small white teddy bear with its nose in his mouth and front paws wrapped around the bears head.
My wife and I have always been soft-hearted for God's creatures. The most significant contribution a dog makes in the human relationship experience is the pure blue-print-demonstration of 'unconditional-love.' I am convinced that if all the world's Heads-of-State were women and everybody was required to own a dog there would be no wars and no domestic violence!
I shall never forget a time when a basketball fan was giving me some crap as I walked from the court after coaching a game. I spun around and in a stern scolding voice-finger pointing, I said, "Listen you jerk, I have a dog at home waiting for me and he thinks that I am the greatest; I am NOT seeking any second opinions!" I have no idea what prompted my comment; suffice to say that my adversary was dumb-founded!
Monday, December 24, 2012
A Bitter-Sweet Christmas
It would be good to have a couple of substantial snowfalls this coming winter, which would give some much needed soil moisture and increase the Decatur Lake level thus avoiding those summertime water restrictions, however I deplore snow, ice and all that accompanies it!
This time of year, I enjoy those family-gatherings but I miss sitting on my backyard swing 'ponedring' the ways of the world. Winter months finds me inside too much and it gives me Claustrophobia. From December until the first of March, I watch too many television (political )pundits and end up 'talking' at the television set; that ain't mentally healthy!
I used to telephone my grandkids years past and pretend to be Santa; lost that 'gig' a few years back. Speaking of gatherings, our home will begin filling up this evening; here is how it goes down. Youngest daughter, Pamela and husband Tim will arrive with their two children about 10 P.M. tonight. Their oldest son, Caleb is a twenty year old sophomore at Eastern Illinois and their youngest daughter, Erica graduates Jacksonville high school this spring. Our son, Steve and wife, Kathy will roll in with Loren (17), triplets, Jake, Jamie and Carter (14) and nine year-old daughter, Shannon early Christmas morning. Married granddaughter, Amanda (Todd) and great-grandson, Talin will miss the Decatur-gathering. Around noon on Christmas day, the O'Keefe's land with teacher granddaughter, Lindsay (22), SIUE big boy, Kyle (21), soon to attend Western Michigan 17-year old, Colin, fifteen year old Connor, Kaitlyn (13), Alexa the eight year old and 18-month old Ashlyn.
We will do the gift exchange stuff and then 'stuff' ourselves while folks will begin to ponder which corner of the home they will likely find a few hours sleep. Early morning on December 26, the gears are shifted; we will hustle about and begin an unfamiliar task as we will travel to the Metro-East area to pay our loving respect to the last of my parents' generation, my Mother, Lou Roustio. She was Mamaw to eight (8) grandchildren, twenty-six (26) great grandchildren and two (2) great-great grandchildren.
After leaving the burial resting site of my parents, we shall each head in different directions to await the New Year of 2013. I know that in the coming days and years all who knew my parents will hold special memories and from time to time they will think of them. I too will call upon many Precious Memories in these remaining days on earth and I suspect often times those 'memories' will occur in the midnight hours.
We shall do our best to celebrate 'that reason-for-the-season' as it is played out in real birth, life, re-birth, death and eternal life. Merry Christmas.
This time of year, I enjoy those family-gatherings but I miss sitting on my backyard swing 'ponedring' the ways of the world. Winter months finds me inside too much and it gives me Claustrophobia. From December until the first of March, I watch too many television (political )pundits and end up 'talking' at the television set; that ain't mentally healthy!
I used to telephone my grandkids years past and pretend to be Santa; lost that 'gig' a few years back. Speaking of gatherings, our home will begin filling up this evening; here is how it goes down. Youngest daughter, Pamela and husband Tim will arrive with their two children about 10 P.M. tonight. Their oldest son, Caleb is a twenty year old sophomore at Eastern Illinois and their youngest daughter, Erica graduates Jacksonville high school this spring. Our son, Steve and wife, Kathy will roll in with Loren (17), triplets, Jake, Jamie and Carter (14) and nine year-old daughter, Shannon early Christmas morning. Married granddaughter, Amanda (Todd) and great-grandson, Talin will miss the Decatur-gathering. Around noon on Christmas day, the O'Keefe's land with teacher granddaughter, Lindsay (22), SIUE big boy, Kyle (21), soon to attend Western Michigan 17-year old, Colin, fifteen year old Connor, Kaitlyn (13), Alexa the eight year old and 18-month old Ashlyn.
We will do the gift exchange stuff and then 'stuff' ourselves while folks will begin to ponder which corner of the home they will likely find a few hours sleep. Early morning on December 26, the gears are shifted; we will hustle about and begin an unfamiliar task as we will travel to the Metro-East area to pay our loving respect to the last of my parents' generation, my Mother, Lou Roustio. She was Mamaw to eight (8) grandchildren, twenty-six (26) great grandchildren and two (2) great-great grandchildren.
After leaving the burial resting site of my parents, we shall each head in different directions to await the New Year of 2013. I know that in the coming days and years all who knew my parents will hold special memories and from time to time they will think of them. I too will call upon many Precious Memories in these remaining days on earth and I suspect often times those 'memories' will occur in the midnight hours.
We shall do our best to celebrate 'that reason-for-the-season' as it is played out in real birth, life, re-birth, death and eternal life. Merry Christmas.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Well Done; Good and Faithful Servant
My brother, Tom (Glen Carbon) telephoned me Thursday, December 20 in the early morning; our Mother Lucille had fallen twice. The assisted living nurses suggested that he telephone and tell his brothers that our ninety-three year Mother was 'in trouble.' My wife Gerry and I left immediately to be at her side and with family.
I spent the night with my Mom as she continued her downward spiral. In the early afternoon and into the early evening hours Mother was somewhat coherent but often times confused and irritated. The nursing staff immediately began administering morphine and other medications to attempt to keep Mother sedated and comfortable.
Quickly, Mother slipped into a place of tranquility but out of our communication reach. Throughout the midnight hours her breathing became more laborious and that gurgling throat noise more pronounced.
At approximately 6:30A.M. the Nurses came to Mother's bedside and gave another dose of morphine and re-positioned her for greater comfort. At 7:00 A.M., I left for about twenty minutes to pickup my wife and bring her to Mom's side. As Gerry walked to the bedside, Mother took one final breath and peacefully entered that promise glory that we who confess Christ shall one day share. It was December 21, 2012 @ 7:45 A.M.
Of course, tears are a part of all final goodbyes. However, I thank God for two parents who loved me but yet did not worship me. Two parents who demonstrated to their children and grandchildren how to live, give and leave.
I pray that I can be strong in modeling those behaviors.
Our (Roustios) family will continue their Christmas celebration on December 26, as we all journey to the Metro-East and share our love and Precious Memories of Mother / Mamaw. Just hope the eulogist can keep it all in perspective and keep it on the road.
I wish all, especially those who take a moment each day to read my blog, A Merry Christmas and God's nearness and blessings this coming New Year.
It is often said that 'only the strong survive;' perhaps, however, I say it is the 'givers' who make it worth surviving! Find a need and fill it in 2013.
I spent the night with my Mom as she continued her downward spiral. In the early afternoon and into the early evening hours Mother was somewhat coherent but often times confused and irritated. The nursing staff immediately began administering morphine and other medications to attempt to keep Mother sedated and comfortable.
Quickly, Mother slipped into a place of tranquility but out of our communication reach. Throughout the midnight hours her breathing became more laborious and that gurgling throat noise more pronounced.
At approximately 6:30A.M. the Nurses came to Mother's bedside and gave another dose of morphine and re-positioned her for greater comfort. At 7:00 A.M., I left for about twenty minutes to pickup my wife and bring her to Mom's side. As Gerry walked to the bedside, Mother took one final breath and peacefully entered that promise glory that we who confess Christ shall one day share. It was December 21, 2012 @ 7:45 A.M.
Of course, tears are a part of all final goodbyes. However, I thank God for two parents who loved me but yet did not worship me. Two parents who demonstrated to their children and grandchildren how to live, give and leave.
I pray that I can be strong in modeling those behaviors.
Our (Roustios) family will continue their Christmas celebration on December 26, as we all journey to the Metro-East and share our love and Precious Memories of Mother / Mamaw. Just hope the eulogist can keep it all in perspective and keep it on the road.
I wish all, especially those who take a moment each day to read my blog, A Merry Christmas and God's nearness and blessings this coming New Year.
It is often said that 'only the strong survive;' perhaps, however, I say it is the 'givers' who make it worth surviving! Find a need and fill it in 2013.
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Say What ?
If I never listen and consider opposing views, I become stagnant and far less than I should be if I am to be relevant and/or effective in my calling purpose. Okay, let me unscramble that philosophical belief. I maintain that all have some purpose or some talent, which could and should be applied to some void or need. Before one can make this talent meet some need one must come to 'know thy self.' Who am I as defined by those inner feelings and emotions that stir my interests?
I have resolved 'that' question in my personal life; I know myself! I will re-visit this comment at the end. First, however is this matter of considering opposing voices. I always wanted to hear the other (counter) opinion; never did I feel that I could advance my convictions or achieve coveted goals if I only paid heed to those 'yes' people. The many years that I was a head basketball coach, I created an environment wherein my assistant coaches were encouraged to challenge that which I was doing as the leader; so long as all challenges were made in private. This setting caused me to either abort my plan or find reason for greater commitment to my approach.
Even today, I hold strong liberal/Democrat views on most social issues but I listen to the voices of the ultra-conservatives who oppose those views. Just today, I listened to Conservative talk show personality, Rush Limbaugh as he was making yet another case against President Obama. On the heels of the mass killing of elementary school students in Newtown, CT., Limbaugh states that this is the fourth such mass-murdering event during Obama's Presidency and he surmised, "Obama is averaging one horrific mass murder tragedy per year in office." I suppose we should thus accept the Rush's message that it was and is Obama who allowed or causes these terrible murders.
It is a not a stretch agreeing that Mr. Limbaugh is an individual who regularly delivers comments of animosity/hate towards one political philosophy. May it suffice to say, he (Limbaugh) is never caught advancing reasonable solutions found in Christian teaching or compromise. Limbaugh surely 'knows himself' and he seems to believe that the need of divisive rhetoric is to be his applied talent. Limbaugh's repeated radio hate messages, which started in 1988, have paralleled an annual 7,500 hate crimes in America. Shall we process this data and make a Limbaugh conclusion here?
Okay, I shall acknowledge that any such conclusion predicated on Limbaugh's comments are total poppycock. However, I remain certain that Limbaugh will defend his conclusions on Obama as Gordon Allport* would state and I paraphrase: 'The truly prejudice mind simply changes his wrongly proven beliefs so as to continue supporting his ATTITUDE of hate.'
Oh, the matter of my personal 'know thy self'...I have applied most of my talents and energies to identify and develop programs/methods that celebrate previous accomplishments of people, which gives deserving kudos while establishing standards for newcomers to meet and surpass.
* Gordon Allport, author of 'The Nature of Prejudice'
I have resolved 'that' question in my personal life; I know myself! I will re-visit this comment at the end. First, however is this matter of considering opposing voices. I always wanted to hear the other (counter) opinion; never did I feel that I could advance my convictions or achieve coveted goals if I only paid heed to those 'yes' people. The many years that I was a head basketball coach, I created an environment wherein my assistant coaches were encouraged to challenge that which I was doing as the leader; so long as all challenges were made in private. This setting caused me to either abort my plan or find reason for greater commitment to my approach.
Even today, I hold strong liberal/Democrat views on most social issues but I listen to the voices of the ultra-conservatives who oppose those views. Just today, I listened to Conservative talk show personality, Rush Limbaugh as he was making yet another case against President Obama. On the heels of the mass killing of elementary school students in Newtown, CT., Limbaugh states that this is the fourth such mass-murdering event during Obama's Presidency and he surmised, "Obama is averaging one horrific mass murder tragedy per year in office." I suppose we should thus accept the Rush's message that it was and is Obama who allowed or causes these terrible murders.
It is a not a stretch agreeing that Mr. Limbaugh is an individual who regularly delivers comments of animosity/hate towards one political philosophy. May it suffice to say, he (Limbaugh) is never caught advancing reasonable solutions found in Christian teaching or compromise. Limbaugh surely 'knows himself' and he seems to believe that the need of divisive rhetoric is to be his applied talent. Limbaugh's repeated radio hate messages, which started in 1988, have paralleled an annual 7,500 hate crimes in America. Shall we process this data and make a Limbaugh conclusion here?
Okay, I shall acknowledge that any such conclusion predicated on Limbaugh's comments are total poppycock. However, I remain certain that Limbaugh will defend his conclusions on Obama as Gordon Allport* would state and I paraphrase: 'The truly prejudice mind simply changes his wrongly proven beliefs so as to continue supporting his ATTITUDE of hate.'
Oh, the matter of my personal 'know thy self'...I have applied most of my talents and energies to identify and develop programs/methods that celebrate previous accomplishments of people, which gives deserving kudos while establishing standards for newcomers to meet and surpass.
* Gordon Allport, author of 'The Nature of Prejudice'
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
I Can Only Hope & Pray
I have been giving considerable thought to writing down some New Year's Resolutions, however the very exercise holds the notion that I am less than 'perfect' and that introspective is most distasteful.
I shall instead continue to level my poignant opinions.
I have preached for years against the ridiculous child-rearing philosophy that if parents and mentors give out constant 'praise' the child somehow benefits. In sport we noted this 'gummy-bears' approach played out with every motor-moron kid getting some trophy at season's end. I have always maintained this to be absolute bull-butter poppycock! My adversaries would argue that 'it makes the kid feel good about self' and thus the child will eventually elevate playing skills. Readers, if I take this proposed philosophical notion to its zenith, I could blow enough smoke in my grandson's posterior and he will surpass Barry Bond's home run mark without shooting-up dope!
Hallelujah! A new study reports the following findings: It appears that there is part of the brain that processes unwarranted praise by shutting-down effort because the kid thinks he is OKAY performing at the current level and thus goes about effort and focus in a 'business as usual' manner.
Now that this bogus crap has been cleared up, I can only hope that soon a study will come forth concluding that if you 'spank' a young child's butt displaying bad choices, poor manners, selfish behavior and disrespect for others that child will have the better chance to grow up successful, happier and sustain longer loving relationships. The number of spankings that I received from my Father can be counted on one hand; the first few made an impression and soon, he only needed to get my attention saying, "Hey, boy straighten up and fly right!"
Now, you will excuse me while I ponder those resolutions.
I shall instead continue to level my poignant opinions.
I have preached for years against the ridiculous child-rearing philosophy that if parents and mentors give out constant 'praise' the child somehow benefits. In sport we noted this 'gummy-bears' approach played out with every motor-moron kid getting some trophy at season's end. I have always maintained this to be absolute bull-butter poppycock! My adversaries would argue that 'it makes the kid feel good about self' and thus the child will eventually elevate playing skills. Readers, if I take this proposed philosophical notion to its zenith, I could blow enough smoke in my grandson's posterior and he will surpass Barry Bond's home run mark without shooting-up dope!
Hallelujah! A new study reports the following findings: It appears that there is part of the brain that processes unwarranted praise by shutting-down effort because the kid thinks he is OKAY performing at the current level and thus goes about effort and focus in a 'business as usual' manner.
Now that this bogus crap has been cleared up, I can only hope that soon a study will come forth concluding that if you 'spank' a young child's butt displaying bad choices, poor manners, selfish behavior and disrespect for others that child will have the better chance to grow up successful, happier and sustain longer loving relationships. The number of spankings that I received from my Father can be counted on one hand; the first few made an impression and soon, he only needed to get my attention saying, "Hey, boy straighten up and fly right!"
Now, you will excuse me while I ponder those resolutions.
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Can I Get An Amen?
And so the song goes, "God Bless America land that I love...", we better hope that the Almighty blesses our land because our country is overindulged in greed and lust that surpasses even the piggish cravings of the Roman Empire's most disgusting times. I sincerely doubt that Nero 'fiddled' while Rome burned, but I do know that our elected leaders behave as children fighting for sandbox toys while the country sputters towards economic disaster and our citizens are ruthlessly murdered. We observe our lawmakers arguing about a fetus' 'right' to life, illegal immigrants and saving the second amendment right while six year-old school children, movie goers, college kids and Christmas Mall shoppers are gunned down by deranged people who were once housed in mental facilities. Our application of first and second amendment rights is miss-applied to trump our common sense. America's culture of violence is documented by the most graphic movies and video games at the expense of creating an ambivalent attitude towards human respect and life! That's correct, "from the mountains to the prairie to the oceans white with foam," we are no longer 'free' but must be on constant alert for our safety.
We have become a nation of self-interest, self-serving and self-absorbed people who, if we make a living farming wish to protect the 9 billion dollars of Government subsidies while ranting against a food stamp entitlement program. We are so lame brained that we say the stupid, as that we wish our Government to 'keep its hands off our Medicare and Social Security.' We have some folks who 'talk' complete nonsense about some imagined fear of 'socialism' while we enjoy Interstate highways and endless government services due to a 'socialist' philosophy.
During the previous Presidential election we watched many of our government leaders attempt to make it more difficult for our citizens to vote instead of seeking avenues to increase the voting numbers. We note politicians blaming teachers for failing schools after underfunding education. The very apathy of the people of Illinois is mind boggling. Consider please, the debate held several years ago regarding casino gambling. The gambling revenues were going to be the answer for school funds. Today, our State is financially broke, our teachers may not receive pensions and every school district in the great 'Land of Lincoln' is owed money by State Government!
Each Presidential candidates party, this past election, raised over 100 billion dollars...that's each party. While America 'burns' our politicians will continue their quest for power and money. While our streets grow evermore dangerous those politicians will vote a pay raise and hold their next fund raiser. Little will change before our next bridge collapses or innocent people are senselessly murdered by their neighbor.
Yes, indeed, God Bless America!
We have become a nation of self-interest, self-serving and self-absorbed people who, if we make a living farming wish to protect the 9 billion dollars of Government subsidies while ranting against a food stamp entitlement program. We are so lame brained that we say the stupid, as that we wish our Government to 'keep its hands off our Medicare and Social Security.' We have some folks who 'talk' complete nonsense about some imagined fear of 'socialism' while we enjoy Interstate highways and endless government services due to a 'socialist' philosophy.
During the previous Presidential election we watched many of our government leaders attempt to make it more difficult for our citizens to vote instead of seeking avenues to increase the voting numbers. We note politicians blaming teachers for failing schools after underfunding education. The very apathy of the people of Illinois is mind boggling. Consider please, the debate held several years ago regarding casino gambling. The gambling revenues were going to be the answer for school funds. Today, our State is financially broke, our teachers may not receive pensions and every school district in the great 'Land of Lincoln' is owed money by State Government!
Each Presidential candidates party, this past election, raised over 100 billion dollars...that's each party. While America 'burns' our politicians will continue their quest for power and money. While our streets grow evermore dangerous those politicians will vote a pay raise and hold their next fund raiser. Little will change before our next bridge collapses or innocent people are senselessly murdered by their neighbor.
Yes, indeed, God Bless America!
Monday, December 17, 2012
A Family Journey
Our journeys hold many 'turns and dips' some of which are predictable as a slow rising sun while others appear with the suddenness of a quake. The greater the tribe's numbers, the larger the circle of love and the larger circle increases those probabilities of turns and dips.
My wife, Gerry and I headed back to the Metro-East area this past Saturday, a mere three days after the funeral of my sister-in law. This trek promised to be a more fun-filled Christmas-holiday gathering of my in-laws. Our entourage would include our three children, their spouses, grandchildren and even boyfriends/girlfriends of older grandkids. We would all meet at our first planned stop, my mother, Lou's assisted living quarters in Glen Carbon for a Christmas-moment.
The ninety-three matriarch of the Roustio/Bennett clan is in declining health and at times is most unsure and feeble. None-the-less, she appeared somewhat engaged with the fourteen individuals who took turns visiting, laughing and sharing gifts with their beloved Mamaw. The scene is a far different 'look' for this seventy-three year old son who recalls a young, vibrant and beautiful young woman who side-by-side with my Father would regale us with holiday foods, gifts and family festivities. Oh, the many turns and dips since 'those wonderful years.'
After the hour and a half visit with a weary but happy old lady, the gang began its quick stops at three different internment sites to pay respect to no fewer than fourteen late-love ones who once shared this pilgrimage. It was now time to turn our attention to the 'family-celebration' at my brother-in law's spacious Edwardsville home. The gathering began in mid-afternoon and continued well into the early evening hours. The laughter, story-telling and love of belonging was and is so very much as most who read this blog; the reader's own family recollections underscore any attempt on my behalf to profile such joy.
As the evening wore on, our son and his family departed for another gathering while our youngest daughter and family headed back to Jacksonville. Our oldest daughter, who faced the longer trip back to Chicago would rest the night at a nearby hotel as would my wife and I. We would plan to meet for an early morning breakfast, stop by Mamaw's dwelling before heading home to Decatur and Chicago respectively.
One of those sudden turns/dips disrupted those plans when my brother telephoned to tell me that our mother had fallen and was rushed to the hospital emergency room at 6 A.M. Sunday. My wife and I would shoulder the day's vigil until mother's discharge early afternoon. The hospital x-rays, scans and tests would disclose some troubling information but that is a 'turn and dip' for which we have been anticipating. We will seek strength and comfort as we approach 'that' journey's moment.
May our God who shall give our family strength be with those parents in Newtown, Connecticut who must deal with the most unimaginable 'turn' in a life's journey. May the prayers, in behalf of those who mourn, from every faith and believer become a unified petition never before heard by our Creator.
PS. I should tell you that as we were leaving the hospital, I saw a former Edwardsville basketball player of mine from the early 1970's, Vince Alleria. He and his wife were entering the facility to say hello to their second grandchild born that morning; oh, what a wonderful and joyous time in their 'journey!'
My wife, Gerry and I headed back to the Metro-East area this past Saturday, a mere three days after the funeral of my sister-in law. This trek promised to be a more fun-filled Christmas-holiday gathering of my in-laws. Our entourage would include our three children, their spouses, grandchildren and even boyfriends/girlfriends of older grandkids. We would all meet at our first planned stop, my mother, Lou's assisted living quarters in Glen Carbon for a Christmas-moment.
The ninety-three matriarch of the Roustio/Bennett clan is in declining health and at times is most unsure and feeble. None-the-less, she appeared somewhat engaged with the fourteen individuals who took turns visiting, laughing and sharing gifts with their beloved Mamaw. The scene is a far different 'look' for this seventy-three year old son who recalls a young, vibrant and beautiful young woman who side-by-side with my Father would regale us with holiday foods, gifts and family festivities. Oh, the many turns and dips since 'those wonderful years.'
After the hour and a half visit with a weary but happy old lady, the gang began its quick stops at three different internment sites to pay respect to no fewer than fourteen late-love ones who once shared this pilgrimage. It was now time to turn our attention to the 'family-celebration' at my brother-in law's spacious Edwardsville home. The gathering began in mid-afternoon and continued well into the early evening hours. The laughter, story-telling and love of belonging was and is so very much as most who read this blog; the reader's own family recollections underscore any attempt on my behalf to profile such joy.
As the evening wore on, our son and his family departed for another gathering while our youngest daughter and family headed back to Jacksonville. Our oldest daughter, who faced the longer trip back to Chicago would rest the night at a nearby hotel as would my wife and I. We would plan to meet for an early morning breakfast, stop by Mamaw's dwelling before heading home to Decatur and Chicago respectively.
One of those sudden turns/dips disrupted those plans when my brother telephoned to tell me that our mother had fallen and was rushed to the hospital emergency room at 6 A.M. Sunday. My wife and I would shoulder the day's vigil until mother's discharge early afternoon. The hospital x-rays, scans and tests would disclose some troubling information but that is a 'turn and dip' for which we have been anticipating. We will seek strength and comfort as we approach 'that' journey's moment.
May our God who shall give our family strength be with those parents in Newtown, Connecticut who must deal with the most unimaginable 'turn' in a life's journey. May the prayers, in behalf of those who mourn, from every faith and believer become a unified petition never before heard by our Creator.
PS. I should tell you that as we were leaving the hospital, I saw a former Edwardsville basketball player of mine from the early 1970's, Vince Alleria. He and his wife were entering the facility to say hello to their second grandchild born that morning; oh, what a wonderful and joyous time in their 'journey!'
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Unlike Common Things
It seems months ago that my wife and I were in Branson, Missouri soaking up the local cuisine and entertainment variety shows, however it was but three weeks ago. Every time we go to Branson I cannot help but view that trip as an AARP response to the college-sets 'spring break' trek. Actually, I view the two experience of opposite-end age groups as parallel dissimilarities. (If that is not an oxymoron nothing IS).
Both the Branson 'babes' and the spring break dollies wear T-shirts with printing on the front. The young chicks likely have a suggestive-slogan across 'points' of interest, which will later be in a wet T-shirt contest; the older hens have bragging print about grandkids across a sloping T-shirts that only get wet in Tide-wash water. The Branson tourist go to bed about the time spring-breakers are 'going-out.' The Branson 'old-timers' are struggling to get out of their beds, gripped with arthritic-pain about the time the youngins' are 'stubling-into bed' feeling no-pain! Many spring-breakers 'do drugs' to get wasted while most Seniors 'do drugs' not to feel wasted!
One Branson evening, I was watching a television documentary before bedtime. The topic was about that time in 1960, when Roman Catholic Presidential candidate, JFK was answering all those questions about his Catholic faith. Why those Southern Baptist ministerial association preachers really grilled that young fella. It caused me to believe that if we let too much religion influence our government, we may be moving to become like some of those Middle East countries where the government endorse only one religion and kill others who believe differently!
The next morning, I mentioned the documentary to my dear friend who is Baptist. He said he'd give me a solid 'tip' about his Baptist brethren. My friend said, "You don't ever want to take a Baptist fishing with you because he'll drink all your beer; take two Baptist because neither one will drink your beer."
P.s. A promise is a promise to keep and I'll not break mine talking about guns in our society until February 14, 2013, which is the anniversary of the Saint Valentine's Day Massacre. In the meanwhile, you research how many people died in that 1929 killing...then think about our times!
Both the Branson 'babes' and the spring break dollies wear T-shirts with printing on the front. The young chicks likely have a suggestive-slogan across 'points' of interest, which will later be in a wet T-shirt contest; the older hens have bragging print about grandkids across a sloping T-shirts that only get wet in Tide-wash water. The Branson tourist go to bed about the time spring-breakers are 'going-out.' The Branson 'old-timers' are struggling to get out of their beds, gripped with arthritic-pain about the time the youngins' are 'stubling-into bed' feeling no-pain! Many spring-breakers 'do drugs' to get wasted while most Seniors 'do drugs' not to feel wasted!
One Branson evening, I was watching a television documentary before bedtime. The topic was about that time in 1960, when Roman Catholic Presidential candidate, JFK was answering all those questions about his Catholic faith. Why those Southern Baptist ministerial association preachers really grilled that young fella. It caused me to believe that if we let too much religion influence our government, we may be moving to become like some of those Middle East countries where the government endorse only one religion and kill others who believe differently!
The next morning, I mentioned the documentary to my dear friend who is Baptist. He said he'd give me a solid 'tip' about his Baptist brethren. My friend said, "You don't ever want to take a Baptist fishing with you because he'll drink all your beer; take two Baptist because neither one will drink your beer."
P.s. A promise is a promise to keep and I'll not break mine talking about guns in our society until February 14, 2013, which is the anniversary of the Saint Valentine's Day Massacre. In the meanwhile, you research how many people died in that 1929 killing...then think about our times!
Friday, December 14, 2012
Talk To Me!
Do you ever have any of those 'shoulda-coulda-asked-triggers?' It is when you say to yourself, 'Sure wish I had asked them that question?' I can best explain that of which I speak by laying out a couple of scenarios. A few weeks ago, I was watching a television documentary about the Great Plains Dust Bowl of the 1930's. As the story unfolds it gives rise to factors, which caused the 'dust bowl' and I didn't realize that some farming techniques that stripped the land of grasses contributed so greatly to the devastation from the event. I was alarmed at the human suffering.
I thought immediately, I sure could have leaned much about this American history tragedy by asking my grandparents; they lived it. I suppose during my grandchild-grandparent window-of-time interaction, I was interested in other things. When they were alive I could have asked more questions and now that they are gone, I can only get secondhand information.
Often times during the baseball season, I will hear some story about a baseball player of yesteryear and remember my Dad mentioning 'that' player's name. The 'shoulda-coulda-asked trigger goes off again; my Dad saw the old timer play...sure wish I had asked Dad a question or two about the guy. Whoops, missed that chance! Hey, I'm not to blame. My parents could have been after me more about teeth care and interviewing grandparents about things. I need to clear this up with Dr. Phil.
I get upset with my own grandkids and I have for sometime. When we are together they seemingly cannot put away those damn iPhone and computer devices; it truly pisses me off and I tell them but to absolutely no avail! I use to say some sarcastic comment to the kids and you can bet their mommy comes galloping to the kid's defense. So, I stop saying anything. Most of the time when the grandkids come to the house, I watch television and they are busy with the IPhone; of course, we do our separate things in the same room for a spell.
Well, lo' and behold, one of my daughters recently sent me an email and called me ahead to tell me, "Dad, I think you'll enjoy the email I sent." The email showed several pictures people groups (all ages) each person ignoring every other person in the group but intensely concentrating on their own hand held iPhone computer. I recall when all this crap began; 1980, when that little turd, PAC Man showed up eating those freaking 'dots.' The final picture on the email is that of Albert Einstein with his quote: "I fear that some day when technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots."
Look about and check out your world. I sent a reply email to my daughter; "Can you possibly imagine the conversations you won't have with your grandkids?" Come to think of it, I have some of my own children who would prefer messing with the Internet, etc. than visiting with me.
I thought immediately, I sure could have leaned much about this American history tragedy by asking my grandparents; they lived it. I suppose during my grandchild-grandparent window-of-time interaction, I was interested in other things. When they were alive I could have asked more questions and now that they are gone, I can only get secondhand information.
Often times during the baseball season, I will hear some story about a baseball player of yesteryear and remember my Dad mentioning 'that' player's name. The 'shoulda-coulda-asked trigger goes off again; my Dad saw the old timer play...sure wish I had asked Dad a question or two about the guy. Whoops, missed that chance! Hey, I'm not to blame. My parents could have been after me more about teeth care and interviewing grandparents about things. I need to clear this up with Dr. Phil.
I get upset with my own grandkids and I have for sometime. When we are together they seemingly cannot put away those damn iPhone and computer devices; it truly pisses me off and I tell them but to absolutely no avail! I use to say some sarcastic comment to the kids and you can bet their mommy comes galloping to the kid's defense. So, I stop saying anything. Most of the time when the grandkids come to the house, I watch television and they are busy with the IPhone; of course, we do our separate things in the same room for a spell.
Well, lo' and behold, one of my daughters recently sent me an email and called me ahead to tell me, "Dad, I think you'll enjoy the email I sent." The email showed several pictures people groups (all ages) each person ignoring every other person in the group but intensely concentrating on their own hand held iPhone computer. I recall when all this crap began; 1980, when that little turd, PAC Man showed up eating those freaking 'dots.' The final picture on the email is that of Albert Einstein with his quote: "I fear that some day when technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots."
Look about and check out your world. I sent a reply email to my daughter; "Can you possibly imagine the conversations you won't have with your grandkids?" Come to think of it, I have some of my own children who would prefer messing with the Internet, etc. than visiting with me.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
A February 14, 2013, Promise!
Let me clear out the head-clutter, which I accumulate from time to time and move on to other 'stuff.'
I can tell you that I am tired on every level. My sister-in law, Jean's wake (Tuesday) and the funeral yesterday morning put my wife and I back in Decatur late Wednesday. After putting away luggage and checking some telephone messages and emails, I showered and had pajamas on by 6 P.M. I truly cannot determine what fatigues me the most, a seventy-three year-old body that simply runs low on octane or a same age brain, which engages many emotions on the heels of so many recent deaths of family, friends and young, former basketball players whom I coached. As most 'guys,' I pride myself in that super-macho, 'I am man; I am strong,' which is actually nothing more than a persona emerging from 'smoke & mirrors.' That said, there comes a time when I must withdraw/retreat and gain composure.
I had a decent night's sleep so I'll tackle one of my favorite pet-peeves then promise you readers that I Will not mention the issue again until Saint Valentine's Day when it will be more appropriately to so do. I am referring to guns, too damn many guns in our society. I swear to you that on Wednesday's Decatur-Herald-Review newspaper, above the fold, appeared two articles side-by-side and I wondered, 'Does anybody note this crap other than me? Newspaper headlines: 'Illinois Lawmakers Near Passage of Concealed Carry Bill;' one column over... 'Man Fatally Shot In Decatur Park.'
The day before our brilliant hillbilly Illinois lawmakers move a moronic piece of legislation along, there was another one of those Shopping Mall multiple murders, this time in Oregon. If you do nothing but get your butt out of bed Saturday mornings and watch television cowboy flicks, you will see how the old American West towns were made safe; Dammit, the sheriff collected the cowboys' guns when they came to town and gave the guns back when the bow-legged boys were back on old-paint headin' out-of-town! Today, we are a nation of idiots who elect bigger morons to serve in government.
I know, you think that I am just an old cynical bastard, I understand that. Okay, then you square this one with your younger more 'hip' progressive thinking: Recently we have had our American Armed Forces leaders tell us that our soon to be military-age service people are too fat to pass most of the normal military training expectations. Our nations' medical doctors warn us that our children are so damned obese that early onset of heart disease and diabetes is a guaranteed fact for the next couple of generations. How and why did we arrive at this societal junction?
Just perhaps over the previous thirty-years parents became more inclined to never say 'no' to Junior & Missy but give into the kids' every gluttonous desire and an excuse note to the physical education teacher for the little 'porkers' not to work up a sweat. You ask fifteen folks WHO had public school physical education in the 1960's about their P.E classes and the 'President's Fitness Test.' On second thought don't bother, they too are likely cynical old bastards also.
Please; I SAY, PLEASE! The fiscal cliff is not the only plunge we may take. Cry me a river and go buy the fat kid a gun for Christmas!
I can tell you that I am tired on every level. My sister-in law, Jean's wake (Tuesday) and the funeral yesterday morning put my wife and I back in Decatur late Wednesday. After putting away luggage and checking some telephone messages and emails, I showered and had pajamas on by 6 P.M. I truly cannot determine what fatigues me the most, a seventy-three year-old body that simply runs low on octane or a same age brain, which engages many emotions on the heels of so many recent deaths of family, friends and young, former basketball players whom I coached. As most 'guys,' I pride myself in that super-macho, 'I am man; I am strong,' which is actually nothing more than a persona emerging from 'smoke & mirrors.' That said, there comes a time when I must withdraw/retreat and gain composure.
I had a decent night's sleep so I'll tackle one of my favorite pet-peeves then promise you readers that I Will not mention the issue again until Saint Valentine's Day when it will be more appropriately to so do. I am referring to guns, too damn many guns in our society. I swear to you that on Wednesday's Decatur-Herald-Review newspaper, above the fold, appeared two articles side-by-side and I wondered, 'Does anybody note this crap other than me? Newspaper headlines: 'Illinois Lawmakers Near Passage of Concealed Carry Bill;' one column over... 'Man Fatally Shot In Decatur Park.'
The day before our brilliant hillbilly Illinois lawmakers move a moronic piece of legislation along, there was another one of those Shopping Mall multiple murders, this time in Oregon. If you do nothing but get your butt out of bed Saturday mornings and watch television cowboy flicks, you will see how the old American West towns were made safe; Dammit, the sheriff collected the cowboys' guns when they came to town and gave the guns back when the bow-legged boys were back on old-paint headin' out-of-town! Today, we are a nation of idiots who elect bigger morons to serve in government.
I know, you think that I am just an old cynical bastard, I understand that. Okay, then you square this one with your younger more 'hip' progressive thinking: Recently we have had our American Armed Forces leaders tell us that our soon to be military-age service people are too fat to pass most of the normal military training expectations. Our nations' medical doctors warn us that our children are so damned obese that early onset of heart disease and diabetes is a guaranteed fact for the next couple of generations. How and why did we arrive at this societal junction?
Just perhaps over the previous thirty-years parents became more inclined to never say 'no' to Junior & Missy but give into the kids' every gluttonous desire and an excuse note to the physical education teacher for the little 'porkers' not to work up a sweat. You ask fifteen folks WHO had public school physical education in the 1960's about their P.E classes and the 'President's Fitness Test.' On second thought don't bother, they too are likely cynical old bastards also.
Please; I SAY, PLEASE! The fiscal cliff is not the only plunge we may take. Cry me a river and go buy the fat kid a gun for Christmas!
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
It's Commin' Around Again!
Perhaps as it should be, we are so absorbed in our own life's journey that we give little thought to 'this' cycle of life and its culmination. I have long noted others' frustration with my Mother's weariness and her frequently spoken words, "I wish the Lord would call me home." I get it, she is ninety-three, has a number of physical maladies and her family love ones and close friends of her generation are all 'gone.' She is trapped in a quiet foreign place, which was once noisy and familiar.
Yes! I get it. My wife and I travel to Highland today to gather with her family to celebrate the life of sister-in law, Jean (Bischof) Conrad. Her death now leaves but two of the six Bischof children alive; my brother-in law, Glenn and my wife, Gerry. Let me assure you that 'back-in-the-day,' that group was something to behold at a family wedding or reunion; no more. Oh, today there are a bunch of nephews & nieces from my wife's siblings but they are in an entirely different cycle phase; they don't know me and I don't know them, however, Jean, Jack, Vince, Donald, Marilyn, Ruth and the list goes on; they all knew me and I knew them...but they are gone. My circle with whom to chat is shrinking. I am most certain that there are far more at these family funerals asking each other,"Who the hell is the tall old-gray-headed guy?" That would me me, kiddos and it seems like just yesterday that I was the youngin' asking that question.
I understand that a recent statistic reveals that 80% of the American population over the age 100 are women. This does not surprise me because I have long believed this to be a possibility. I base my suspicion on the fact that for years, I go the Sunday Church service early so I can get one of the 'good seats' in the back and when sitting back there, I notice more grayish-blue-haired women than bald-headed gents!
Without question the recent explosion of the senior-citizens' communal living, i.e. 'independent/assisted-living' housing growth stave's off this lonely-isolated feeling, however sooner or later someone gets to be the oldest amongst the oldest.
Yes! I get it. My wife and I travel to Highland today to gather with her family to celebrate the life of sister-in law, Jean (Bischof) Conrad. Her death now leaves but two of the six Bischof children alive; my brother-in law, Glenn and my wife, Gerry. Let me assure you that 'back-in-the-day,' that group was something to behold at a family wedding or reunion; no more. Oh, today there are a bunch of nephews & nieces from my wife's siblings but they are in an entirely different cycle phase; they don't know me and I don't know them, however, Jean, Jack, Vince, Donald, Marilyn, Ruth and the list goes on; they all knew me and I knew them...but they are gone. My circle with whom to chat is shrinking. I am most certain that there are far more at these family funerals asking each other,"Who the hell is the tall old-gray-headed guy?" That would me me, kiddos and it seems like just yesterday that I was the youngin' asking that question.
I understand that a recent statistic reveals that 80% of the American population over the age 100 are women. This does not surprise me because I have long believed this to be a possibility. I base my suspicion on the fact that for years, I go the Sunday Church service early so I can get one of the 'good seats' in the back and when sitting back there, I notice more grayish-blue-haired women than bald-headed gents!
Without question the recent explosion of the senior-citizens' communal living, i.e. 'independent/assisted-living' housing growth stave's off this lonely-isolated feeling, however sooner or later someone gets to be the oldest amongst the oldest.
Monday, December 10, 2012
Feels Like Old Times!
I lack the desire to mentally retrieve the lost count of eulogies, which I have given over the years. I know that should I 'go' there I will then fight the inclinations of melancholy sadness. I spent much of Saturday morning putting the finishing touches on my sister-in law, Jean Marie (Bischof) Conrad's eulogy as per the request of her five children. Jeanie's funeral in this coming Wednesday, December 12. I took my written-comments into the privacy of my office and read them aloud three times until I had voided myself of all tearful emotions; a must for this eulogist.
Due to my recent days of physical fatigue accompanied by concerns about Jean and my ninety-three year-old Mother's declining health, I needed to get out of the house Saturday afternoon and away by myself for a moment of imbecilic absurdity; what more silly foolishness for me as to 'go' shopping...I hate to shop! I absolutely deplore America's sick love affair with 'name-brand' identification as some ego-lifting status symbol. Often I go shopping with my wife only to become frustrated or angry over the ridiculous cost of clothing. Holy crap, I could buy the following items in 1954: a suit...$45.00; dress shoes: $13.98; Denim jeans: $2.49; Converse All-Star Basketball Shoes: $8.95. (A later reference to these 1950 prices).
Today, I have several nice pairs of dress shoes, which I avoid wearing at great lengths. I prefer the 'white' leather Rockport walking-style shoe that usually sells for about $65-to-$70. No store at the nearby Hickory Point Mall carries the Rockport 'white' walking shoe. I spotted another shoe of the same color at a discount store and it was considerably less expensive... it is the Polo shoe for $21.00, including tax. Can you imagine? Hells bells, I thought I was 'Back to the Future!' When I came home with my great purchase, my wife laughed and made fun of me. She suggested that I should buy better shoes because of my back problems and she added, "Those shoes will likely fall apart when they get wet in a rain." I reject her opinion and embrace my Polo shoes; actually I wore them to Grace United Methodist Church on Sunday and noticed many people sneaking a peek at my shoes; they probably wish to know where I got the snazzy kicks!
...And for the record, it was raining when we came out of Church Sunday morning and my Polo shoes are in tact and looking good on my feet this morning, Thank You!
Due to my recent days of physical fatigue accompanied by concerns about Jean and my ninety-three year-old Mother's declining health, I needed to get out of the house Saturday afternoon and away by myself for a moment of imbecilic absurdity; what more silly foolishness for me as to 'go' shopping...I hate to shop! I absolutely deplore America's sick love affair with 'name-brand' identification as some ego-lifting status symbol. Often I go shopping with my wife only to become frustrated or angry over the ridiculous cost of clothing. Holy crap, I could buy the following items in 1954: a suit...$45.00; dress shoes: $13.98; Denim jeans: $2.49; Converse All-Star Basketball Shoes: $8.95. (A later reference to these 1950 prices).
Today, I have several nice pairs of dress shoes, which I avoid wearing at great lengths. I prefer the 'white' leather Rockport walking-style shoe that usually sells for about $65-to-$70. No store at the nearby Hickory Point Mall carries the Rockport 'white' walking shoe. I spotted another shoe of the same color at a discount store and it was considerably less expensive... it is the Polo shoe for $21.00, including tax. Can you imagine? Hells bells, I thought I was 'Back to the Future!' When I came home with my great purchase, my wife laughed and made fun of me. She suggested that I should buy better shoes because of my back problems and she added, "Those shoes will likely fall apart when they get wet in a rain." I reject her opinion and embrace my Polo shoes; actually I wore them to Grace United Methodist Church on Sunday and noticed many people sneaking a peek at my shoes; they probably wish to know where I got the snazzy kicks!
...And for the record, it was raining when we came out of Church Sunday morning and my Polo shoes are in tact and looking good on my feet this morning, Thank You!
Friday, December 7, 2012
Keep On Keepin' On!
Earlier this week, I received a blog comment from a former Edwardsville high school student named Steve. I appreciate his thoughts and the many other blog readers who share. That seven-year Edwardsville coaching experience (1970-77) will always be a special recall regarding my professional career. When the late coaching icon, Joe Lucco, who was at the time Assistant Superintendent at Edwardsville, offered me the Edwardsville head basketball job, I believed it to be my utopia and certainly the final stop. (More on a final stop later).
Having been a native of nearby East St. Louis and playing both baseball and basketball in the Southwestern Conference, the Metro-East area where family still lives is 'home' and I was 'going home' to coach in that league. During my seven year tenure, I was blessed with good players and our basketball team ended a twenty-year 'Sweet-16' drought for the 'Tigers" in 1976 and our cross-country squads amassed some impressive seasons. However, this was a period when much change was engulfing Edwardsville. The relatively new Southern Illinois University @ Edwardsville brought sharp contrasting liberal views to the long time conservative community. The nearby community, Glen Carbon was shaking up things with some pro-active business growth and building expansions.
Without rehashing the turbulent small-town political and parental wars around the basketball program, suffice to state, it was not going to be my last coaching stop, however the Edwardsville coaching experience would prove to be the most professionally beneficial. Drawing on the Edwardsville years and some other events, I later penned two coaching books, which became personally and financially rewarding while catapulting me into a nationwide speaking circuit and a Sport Education Consulting practice.
Contrary to what some people may think, I hold those Edwardsville times in good memory regarding students and great appreciation to a school administration for the 'shaping' trials and tribulations. It is a reminder that God has a plan for each of us but we must be patient, persevere and seize our moments. Edwardsville prepared me for very significant and rewarding opportunities.
Today, my wife, Gerry and I frequently visit family in the beautiful Edwardsville community. Matter-of-fact, we recently made arrangements to return; Sunset Hills (Edwardsville) will be that final stop.
Please note that I prepared the above blog late last evening. Moments before I posted it this morning, the telephone rang. The voice at the caller's end was Patty Parker, a niece. Patty did not telephone to remind us that today is the anniversary of the bombing of Pearl Harbor nor did she wish to tell us today is her birthday. The purpose of the early morning call was to tell my wife that Patty's Mother (Gerry's Sister), Jeannie had just died; she was 82. It is our family's second and final goodbye to Jeannie; the first was a slow but losing battle with Alzheimer.
We praise God for his mercy and comfort. We thank Him for Jeannie's freedom from suffering bondage and her life eternal without affliction.
Having been a native of nearby East St. Louis and playing both baseball and basketball in the Southwestern Conference, the Metro-East area where family still lives is 'home' and I was 'going home' to coach in that league. During my seven year tenure, I was blessed with good players and our basketball team ended a twenty-year 'Sweet-16' drought for the 'Tigers" in 1976 and our cross-country squads amassed some impressive seasons. However, this was a period when much change was engulfing Edwardsville. The relatively new Southern Illinois University @ Edwardsville brought sharp contrasting liberal views to the long time conservative community. The nearby community, Glen Carbon was shaking up things with some pro-active business growth and building expansions.
Without rehashing the turbulent small-town political and parental wars around the basketball program, suffice to state, it was not going to be my last coaching stop, however the Edwardsville coaching experience would prove to be the most professionally beneficial. Drawing on the Edwardsville years and some other events, I later penned two coaching books, which became personally and financially rewarding while catapulting me into a nationwide speaking circuit and a Sport Education Consulting practice.
Contrary to what some people may think, I hold those Edwardsville times in good memory regarding students and great appreciation to a school administration for the 'shaping' trials and tribulations. It is a reminder that God has a plan for each of us but we must be patient, persevere and seize our moments. Edwardsville prepared me for very significant and rewarding opportunities.
Today, my wife, Gerry and I frequently visit family in the beautiful Edwardsville community. Matter-of-fact, we recently made arrangements to return; Sunset Hills (Edwardsville) will be that final stop.
Please note that I prepared the above blog late last evening. Moments before I posted it this morning, the telephone rang. The voice at the caller's end was Patty Parker, a niece. Patty did not telephone to remind us that today is the anniversary of the bombing of Pearl Harbor nor did she wish to tell us today is her birthday. The purpose of the early morning call was to tell my wife that Patty's Mother (Gerry's Sister), Jeannie had just died; she was 82. It is our family's second and final goodbye to Jeannie; the first was a slow but losing battle with Alzheimer.
We praise God for his mercy and comfort. We thank Him for Jeannie's freedom from suffering bondage and her life eternal without affliction.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Tell Me Something I Don't Know
A friend recently emailed me and suggested that several people with whom I work on various projects may appear to be supportive of me to my face but behind my back perhaps 'sing' another tune. I explained to my courier that I was aware of these human frailties and thanked him for his heralded concerns but suggested he should not fret over such things in my behalf.
I can honestly state that, although these fraudulent and sometimes deceitful personalities are disconcerting, they can be easily compromised and even manipulated to allow for a purposeful and desired conclusion through an intentional leadership. I suppose simply stated, I have since my teen years enjoyed and embraced these kinds of challenges.
As a mentor (coach) of high school athletes, who were often times self-centered and selfish and their many overzealous narrow-minded parents, I had to find successful methods of motivating such personalities from diverse cultural experiences, misconceptions and fears into a team-unit that would accept necessary roles and a sharing attitude. I became better than 'okay' at this challenge; the thirty-nine years coaching-experience makes dealing with adults a 'walk in the park.' I should give much credit to my Father for developing this readiness. He projected interpersonal communication skills that were both cunning and ingenious. I worked for my Father in the business world periodically and observed closely his methods of management-manipulation; often times I would later pick his mind with inquiries. He suggested that a leader should decide if the worthiness of a cause was apparent for profit and/or good. He thought a good leader should plainly identify the 'need, enlist ownership to the cause and fill the need!'
When leading the group both sincerity and respect are always offered first and foremost. If those elements are not reciprocated the leader must confront, expose or attack the offender. A subordinate colleague who often could be suspected of disloyalty once said, "Mel, some people think you are pompous." I said to him, "Be quick with your point, I have some matters to 'serve' and there are people waiting to join me."
I can honestly state that, although these fraudulent and sometimes deceitful personalities are disconcerting, they can be easily compromised and even manipulated to allow for a purposeful and desired conclusion through an intentional leadership. I suppose simply stated, I have since my teen years enjoyed and embraced these kinds of challenges.
As a mentor (coach) of high school athletes, who were often times self-centered and selfish and their many overzealous narrow-minded parents, I had to find successful methods of motivating such personalities from diverse cultural experiences, misconceptions and fears into a team-unit that would accept necessary roles and a sharing attitude. I became better than 'okay' at this challenge; the thirty-nine years coaching-experience makes dealing with adults a 'walk in the park.' I should give much credit to my Father for developing this readiness. He projected interpersonal communication skills that were both cunning and ingenious. I worked for my Father in the business world periodically and observed closely his methods of management-manipulation; often times I would later pick his mind with inquiries. He suggested that a leader should decide if the worthiness of a cause was apparent for profit and/or good. He thought a good leader should plainly identify the 'need, enlist ownership to the cause and fill the need!'
When leading the group both sincerity and respect are always offered first and foremost. If those elements are not reciprocated the leader must confront, expose or attack the offender. A subordinate colleague who often could be suspected of disloyalty once said, "Mel, some people think you are pompous." I said to him, "Be quick with your point, I have some matters to 'serve' and there are people waiting to join me."
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Where It Stops, Nobody Knows!
Here we go again; two more senseless murders and renewed, albeit brief 'gun-talk' gobbledygook!
A professional football player shoots and kills his girlfriend then commits suicide. A 45-year old man drives to a convenient store and while waiting for his girlfriend's return from the store becomes irritated by 'loud music' coming from a nearby auto occupied by four teenage boys. The older man fears threatened so he does his convenient thing; he shoots towards the vehicle killing one youngster. It is another one of those Florida 'stand-your-ground' situations, i.e., Trayvon Martin.
In the aftermath of these terrible tragedies we hear claims, counter-claims and finger-pointing accusations coming from every sociological & psychological perspective imaginable. Personally, I dismiss 90% of these poppycock comments and hang my hat on one true relationship of relative importance; too many people who should not have guns...have guns! I know, 'guns don't kill; people kill!' Bull-butter, without a bat, Babe Ruth hits zero home runs.
Ill-informed folks advocating this Second Amendment suggest that the American people and our government have 'grown comfortable' together because the citizens' have the right to bare arms, which keeps the government 'in line.' Are you crapping me? Our United States government has an Air Force, a Navy, a military armed with tanks and nuclear weapons! You NRA rednecks would lose that fight...honest you would lose! Yet THAT ability to arm a citizenry against a dictatorship government is the outdated reason that we still have the Second Amendment. Let me explain it another way: In 1617, Virginia enacted a 'law' that required all colonist to attend church and gave the militia the power to enforce the law. In time Virginians ignored that law. However, if they wake this coming sabbath morning and see military tanks on the front lawn they may wish to check the newspaper for service times!
Meanwhile, that Second Amendment allows all sorts of deranged folks to access guns. Some of our politicians go crazy over the four Americans who were recently killed by terrorists as they served our country at a foreign embassy. They just cannot stop their fist pounding blame, but not one of those hypocrites becomes the least bit discomposed over their own citizens being gunned down in American streets.
We can amend the Constitution. Remember learning in junior high school about the balance of power between the executive, legislative and judicial branches of government? We 'changed' (altered) that arrangement by 'limiting' the President to two-terms but allowing Congress to eat at the 'public trough' forever...that's working well!
Okay, stand easy, take a deep breath and repeat these words three times. There is big money to be made in guns and illegal drugs so America will always have guns and drug problems...next bogus concern?
A professional football player shoots and kills his girlfriend then commits suicide. A 45-year old man drives to a convenient store and while waiting for his girlfriend's return from the store becomes irritated by 'loud music' coming from a nearby auto occupied by four teenage boys. The older man fears threatened so he does his convenient thing; he shoots towards the vehicle killing one youngster. It is another one of those Florida 'stand-your-ground' situations, i.e., Trayvon Martin.
In the aftermath of these terrible tragedies we hear claims, counter-claims and finger-pointing accusations coming from every sociological & psychological perspective imaginable. Personally, I dismiss 90% of these poppycock comments and hang my hat on one true relationship of relative importance; too many people who should not have guns...have guns! I know, 'guns don't kill; people kill!' Bull-butter, without a bat, Babe Ruth hits zero home runs.
Ill-informed folks advocating this Second Amendment suggest that the American people and our government have 'grown comfortable' together because the citizens' have the right to bare arms, which keeps the government 'in line.' Are you crapping me? Our United States government has an Air Force, a Navy, a military armed with tanks and nuclear weapons! You NRA rednecks would lose that fight...honest you would lose! Yet THAT ability to arm a citizenry against a dictatorship government is the outdated reason that we still have the Second Amendment. Let me explain it another way: In 1617, Virginia enacted a 'law' that required all colonist to attend church and gave the militia the power to enforce the law. In time Virginians ignored that law. However, if they wake this coming sabbath morning and see military tanks on the front lawn they may wish to check the newspaper for service times!
Meanwhile, that Second Amendment allows all sorts of deranged folks to access guns. Some of our politicians go crazy over the four Americans who were recently killed by terrorists as they served our country at a foreign embassy. They just cannot stop their fist pounding blame, but not one of those hypocrites becomes the least bit discomposed over their own citizens being gunned down in American streets.
We can amend the Constitution. Remember learning in junior high school about the balance of power between the executive, legislative and judicial branches of government? We 'changed' (altered) that arrangement by 'limiting' the President to two-terms but allowing Congress to eat at the 'public trough' forever...that's working well!
Okay, stand easy, take a deep breath and repeat these words three times. There is big money to be made in guns and illegal drugs so America will always have guns and drug problems...next bogus concern?
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
It's Just That Way
Each time that I return from a Branson, Missouri (Ozark Country) vacation, I reflect upon its landscape beauty, friendliness of locals, excellent show biz entertainment and good food; certainly add to my recall-list the reminder of how 'old people' can be a pain-in-the-ass! Be put-off if you wish by this statement but know damn square that I am seventy-three and I speak the truth!
This is not a new revelation; I got a good hint about 'pain-in-the-ass' oldsters when my Father owned a Steak House Restaurant for fourteen years. Old people are most likely to complain about an air-draft, food temperatures and portions. They want to combine the Senior Citizen discount coupon, the newspaper ad coupon while requesting the lunch-price menu with dinner-size servings at 6:00 P.M. These old people will 'take' anything they can get into a purse; all condiments, crackers, salt shakers, any centerpiece and the Cracker Barrel 'golf-tee' game. You can bet that some old fart will ask the waitress, "Does your fish taste fishy?" I use to beg the waitresses at Roustio's Sirloin Strip to say, 'No, our fish tastes like banana cream pie, dumb-ass!'
My wife and I were dinning at a Branson IHOP Restaurant and while waiting to be seated with perhaps a dozen others, a table of eight seniors approached the cashier with one receipt and requested the cashier to 'do the math' so the four couples could pay the dinner ticket on separate bills. As I watched this time consuming exercise, I thought how easy it would have been requesting this arrangement when they ordered their meals. Three couples did not return to their tables to leave a tip however, the fourth old turd-blossom handed the cashier a dollar bill on a $14.00 ticket saying, "Give this to the little waitress."
Finally, my wife and I were escorted to our table and when the waitress took our order, she did not write anything down. I commented that she must have a good memory to which she responded, "I'll remember what your ordered tomorrow and if you are like a group I just waited on, I'll remember the order and you forever. I wonder what group she had?
While waiting for our food, my wife began a conversation with the couple seated at the table next to ours; she always starts these conversations, I seldom do but eventually mix in a little vinegar to the honey-coated exchanges. As soon as the gentleman said that they were from Ohio, I commented that it was Ohio and not Florida that made we Americans wait for the Presidential election 'outcome-numbers.' The gent quickly retorted, "And the wrong guy won." Appreciating that my wife was cringing as she sank deeper into her booth-seat, I went easy on the old-boy telling him, "Well, perhaps if we live long enough, you'll pick a winner and I'll pick a loser!"
This is not a new revelation; I got a good hint about 'pain-in-the-ass' oldsters when my Father owned a Steak House Restaurant for fourteen years. Old people are most likely to complain about an air-draft, food temperatures and portions. They want to combine the Senior Citizen discount coupon, the newspaper ad coupon while requesting the lunch-price menu with dinner-size servings at 6:00 P.M. These old people will 'take' anything they can get into a purse; all condiments, crackers, salt shakers, any centerpiece and the Cracker Barrel 'golf-tee' game. You can bet that some old fart will ask the waitress, "Does your fish taste fishy?" I use to beg the waitresses at Roustio's Sirloin Strip to say, 'No, our fish tastes like banana cream pie, dumb-ass!'
My wife and I were dinning at a Branson IHOP Restaurant and while waiting to be seated with perhaps a dozen others, a table of eight seniors approached the cashier with one receipt and requested the cashier to 'do the math' so the four couples could pay the dinner ticket on separate bills. As I watched this time consuming exercise, I thought how easy it would have been requesting this arrangement when they ordered their meals. Three couples did not return to their tables to leave a tip however, the fourth old turd-blossom handed the cashier a dollar bill on a $14.00 ticket saying, "Give this to the little waitress."
Finally, my wife and I were escorted to our table and when the waitress took our order, she did not write anything down. I commented that she must have a good memory to which she responded, "I'll remember what your ordered tomorrow and if you are like a group I just waited on, I'll remember the order and you forever. I wonder what group she had?
While waiting for our food, my wife began a conversation with the couple seated at the table next to ours; she always starts these conversations, I seldom do but eventually mix in a little vinegar to the honey-coated exchanges. As soon as the gentleman said that they were from Ohio, I commented that it was Ohio and not Florida that made we Americans wait for the Presidential election 'outcome-numbers.' The gent quickly retorted, "And the wrong guy won." Appreciating that my wife was cringing as she sank deeper into her booth-seat, I went easy on the old-boy telling him, "Well, perhaps if we live long enough, you'll pick a winner and I'll pick a loser!"
Monday, December 3, 2012
All In Time
With the 43rd Annual Decatur prep boys' basketball tournament responsibilities in 'my' rear view mirror, I felt eager to hit the road last Tuesday for Ozark Country and some 'R & R.' It is a natural to stop in and visit with my mother on this journey and Gerry and I did both going and returning. I suppose those two stops could best be summarized as 'sobbering.' I am not in a state of denial, I realize that Mother Lucille is 93 plus years and in failing health, however I was not fully prepared to observe her recent physical changes.
Mother's once skinny and shapely legs are swollen nearly twice their normal size and the black and blue discoloration is now accompanied by a number of welted blisters nearly circling the legs; heart failure is the diagnosis. She claims that she is not in pain; a circumstance for which we are all grateful.
We are not privileged to tomorrow's 'living-forecast' and that should suggest that we take each day with acknowledged appreciation. My mother, in moments, could be informed of one of her son's death, yet those three sons would be wise to prepare for our Mother's departure from this journey.
It is a bit of a challenge to maintain a constant and meaningful contact with family when 'livig-away'; Gerry and I have a track record on this front that cause us peace of minds! In recent months it has been difficult to enjoy telephone conversations with Mother due to her compromised hearing. My every-other-day telephoning is a futile exercise. I now write letters to Mother in large type but I truly miss her wonderful laugh.
I recall the spring of 1959, when the sociology professor spoke these words in his course entitled: 'The Family,' "The most difficult parent to bury is the second parent; the event signals the termination of the parent-child-relationship." The professor's comment seemed so irrelevant and negligible fifty-three years ago.
Hospice is now part of the daily routine for Mom. I know in my heart that she is ready for eternity's rewards but I shall make plans to visit with her later this week; I just must!
Mother's once skinny and shapely legs are swollen nearly twice their normal size and the black and blue discoloration is now accompanied by a number of welted blisters nearly circling the legs; heart failure is the diagnosis. She claims that she is not in pain; a circumstance for which we are all grateful.
We are not privileged to tomorrow's 'living-forecast' and that should suggest that we take each day with acknowledged appreciation. My mother, in moments, could be informed of one of her son's death, yet those three sons would be wise to prepare for our Mother's departure from this journey.
It is a bit of a challenge to maintain a constant and meaningful contact with family when 'livig-away'; Gerry and I have a track record on this front that cause us peace of minds! In recent months it has been difficult to enjoy telephone conversations with Mother due to her compromised hearing. My every-other-day telephoning is a futile exercise. I now write letters to Mother in large type but I truly miss her wonderful laugh.
I recall the spring of 1959, when the sociology professor spoke these words in his course entitled: 'The Family,' "The most difficult parent to bury is the second parent; the event signals the termination of the parent-child-relationship." The professor's comment seemed so irrelevant and negligible fifty-three years ago.
Hospice is now part of the daily routine for Mom. I know in my heart that she is ready for eternity's rewards but I shall make plans to visit with her later this week; I just must!
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