Hereeee's Mel!

As time passes, I notice family members 'explaining me' to others in my presence as if there is a need to forewarn others of my idiocyincries and out of touch verbal expressions or weird body language. Just last week at church, my wife noticed me leaning forward and cupping my hand to my ear. She said for all within a 20 yard distance, "Mel is hard hearing, you'll have to speak louder." Hell's Bells, that was my purpose for leaning forward and cupping my ear. If you need to explain that to people then we're hanging out with a not very smart crowd.

My wife never reads this blog but my children and the older grandkids do check it out. Therefore, for future reference material, may I offer them the following: If you notice me limping, tell others that I wear orthotic-inserts and I may have them placed in the wrong shoes...I've been known to do this. Then again, my limp could be caused from right-hip osteoarthritis or three back surgeries...just toss those into your explanations of the old man to cover all bases. I did have cataract surgery in my left eye but my right eye needs the procedure. Approach me from the left for quicker recognition. I stopped my aspirin regiment due to stomach ulcers so if my speech becomes slurred my blood may be thickening...call 911.

Now, children and grandchildren, there is a bright side. In fact, you might even brag about the old fart considering that I cut my grass twice a week and trim the entire yard. I complete a daily 15-minute stretching routine followed by a brisk 45-minute walk. I sing aloud everyday in my backyard. Usually four (4) gospel hymns and 10-to-12 songs from the fifties. I recite aloud (to nobody) six nursery rhymes each day. My favorite is 'Peter Piper.' Finally, I'm in the streets of Decatur three times week trying to raise support funds for the Decatur Public High Schools Thanksgiving basketball tournament.

I've come to accept the fact that I can do without a lot of things...except my reading glasses.

Actually, I'm in decent shape for the shape I'm IN...I think.
(Touch)
Just an Old Fart